Procrastinate Now! [nameTK.blogspot.com]

McCain thinks he deserves health care but you don't

2010-03-12T08:20:00.001-05:00

stop by and tell your representatives how you feel

clipped from www.americansunitedforchange.org

Get around to celebrating National Procrastination Week

2010-03-04T20:26:00.002-05:00

I heard about it this morning, and am just now getting around to posting it, so while you've got a day or two left, you might as well make the most of waiting 'til the last minute.

Because I know you were waiting almost all week to have a reason to put off everything you have to do.

(via Lifehacker) [http://www.brownielocks.com/march.html]

Springtime for Winter (and Canada)

2010-02-28T22:39:00.002-05:00

You know that part of The Producers (and I'm referencing the original, Zero Mostel, Gene Wilder version) when the opening sequence of "Springtime for Hitler" starts? And the audience sits there, staring, slackjawed, as the parade of grotesque stereotypes of German "culture" are paraded past?

Well, that was my impression of the Olympic closing ceremonies.

They're not called, "Friendly, Snuggly Whales"

2010-02-25T15:36:00.001-05:00

Click here for untitled

Just what part of "killer" in "killer whale" do people fail to grasp?

Yes, other cultures call them things like "orcas," but someone at some point thought of calling them, not "spotted whales," not "cow whales," "Oreo whales" or even "penguin whales," but saw sufficient reason to give them the name, "killer."

I just heard that this is the third time this particular whale was involved in a human death.

Now, I would not advocate that any particular intelligent mammal's life is more sacred than any other, nor would I necessarily mock the death of an intelligent mammal (or its trainer), but at some point you have to recognize the natural order of things.

Roy Horn and I both have cats in our homes. The difference is, I'm not terribly worried if mine is having a bad day. Something with sharp teeth doesn't have to be much bigger than a cat for me to keep my distance. Bigger than me with sharp teeth? I'm staying over here.

Some people believe they've got a sacred book that gives them dominion over all life on this planet. Most of the other life on this planet hasn't read that book--they're watching YouTube clips of "When Animals Attack."

Best. Gay Marriage. Quote. Evar.

2010-02-23T22:10:00.001-05:00

"One woman and one man might have been OK in your grandmother's day,
but who wants to marry your grandmother? Not even your grandfather!"

Groucho Marx in Animal Crackers

Oh, the Terror(ism)!

2010-02-19T13:15:00.001-05:00

What follows is a reply to another blog post here. This reply was posted in the comments.
----------

Should we argue semantics? Get all hung up on the "true" meanings of words? Yes. It's why we have them.

It's why Charles Manson was a mass-murderer. Son of Sam a serial killer. Why guys who get tired of delivering the mail "go postal."

We have so many words to describe things, you really need to look at why.

There are definitely double standards, which I think was the point of this post.

When the Ft. Hood shootings happened, when it became public knowledge that the shooter's last name was Hassan, immediately the media was filled with "was this an act of terrorism?" His shouting, "glory to god" (I believe the translation of Allah Akbar) didn't help matters.

Did anyone call the VA Tech shooter a terrorist? He wasn't white. I'm pretty sure he wasn't born here, either.

There have been other school shootings, since Columbine, and since 9-11 - they are sadly almost cliche. How many of them were labeled "terrorism?"

I'll also point out that when that small private plane crashed into an apartment building in Manhattan (it killed a baseball player - I'm too lazy to look up details), "terrorism" was the initial, unqualified, panicked response, as people there are still a bit edgy about planes flying into buildings. (turned out someone just fucked up)

People who protested the last presidential administration were labeled "terrorists," or at the very least terrorist sympathizers. What terror did they instill - in anyone other than elected officials?

The riots in LA after the Rodney King verdict - terrorism? Or rioting?

We have violence. We have crime. We have violent crime. We also, now, have legally defined "hate crimes." Beating up someone for being gay - terrorism? I know for a fact a lot of homosexuals who might otherwise come out to their communities don't for fear of physical assault, among other things. They live in constant fear.

All bigots are terrorists? The KKK certainly did a lot to instill fear in black communities. There are, sadly, very many white-supremacist groups. They are organized. They have a political and social agenda. They use violence and fear of more violence to convey their message. Perhaps their time has come to be labeled appropriately?

Violence directed (rightly or no) against a government office - terrorism? With what message? "We're going to resist paying more taxes!" or was it, "I'm destroying everything and I'm taking you with me!"

At risk of going off on a tangent, do I think taxes are fair? The way they're currently levied, no. The tax burden is ridiculously upside down in this country. But I do believe in taxation. We all live in a community, a society, and derive a benefit from that, and we all need to contribute to that to make it work for all of us. I like roads. I like schools. I like police and fire departments. I believe those who derive the largest benefit should contribute the largest amount. That would be the corporations that have judicial and legislative systems that create and enforce laws for their benefit.

The clerk, who wanted a secure job with a pension, checking to see if your returns were filled out properly, is not evil incarnate (typically) and does not deserve to be murdered.

If you attend an organized protest of the wars in Afghanistan, you can, under the PATRIOT act, be grabbed up off the street, held as an "enemy combatant," without bail, without advice of an attorney, subjected to "enhanced interrogation" such as water boarding, even though you're a US citizen, all without being charged with anything other than being a suspected "terrorist."

A guy flying a plane into an IRS building in a fit of destructive, violent, homicidal rage? I wouldn't be too quick to apply the term "terrorist" to him. Throwing labels around like that and some of them might bounce back and stick.

Walmart's raping of the disadvantaged continues

2010-02-15T15:28:00.001-05:00

For those of you who haven't seen the TV ads yet (which curiously show a nebulously interracial couple), Walmart is getting into the check cashing business.

Don't have check cashing establishments around your home? You probably live in an area that's doing OK. They're a staple of neighborhoods that aren't doing so well, financially, along with stores that sell liquor, menthol cigarettes and cheap comestibles barely deserving the term "food."

If you have a check that's made out to you, say, your paycheck, they'll cash it--for a fee. Seems reasonable enough. Walmart offers a "discount" service of "only" $3 for a check up to $1000; $6 for checks up to $5000.

But why would you need to cash it? Why couldn't you just deposit it into your bank account? Banks cash checks for free--assuming you've got cash in your account to cover it. Assuming you've got a bank account.

It's yet another instance of being charged a fee for not having enough money.

Most banks expect a minimum deposit--they charge fees if you fall below the minimum. If those fees are higher than the $3/check, or up to $12/month (or more) Walmart is charging, then saving money means, well, not saving your money.

Not that saving your money is Walmart's aim--the ad shows you all the things you can buy, like mp3 players and computers, presumingly from them, with the "up to $200 per year" you could "save."

And who are these people, the ones who cannot afford to stockpile even one paycheck in a bank? I was one of them. Not for financial reasons, though--I didn't have any ID--I couldn't prove, to the satisfaction of a bank, who I was. Curiously, the rules at the check cashing stores were different. Mediocre, even questionable identification was sufficient to turn a check into cash, but insufficient for saving it in your own name.

These are also Walmart's own employees, most of whom are part-time, at their management's preference.

Assuming a biweekly paycheck at double minimum wage, full-time, after taxes you're still likely to come in under the $1,000 check to meet the $3 price. To restate that, after two weeks of full-time work, you're taking home less than $1000, which is a crime in itself. After 26 paychecks, throw in your tax refund check and you're paying $85. If you work for Walmart, that's paying your money back to your employer for the privilege of them paying you.

That's assuming you don't get an employee discount.

Father/Son Valentines are just Icky

2010-02-13T10:24:00.001-05:00

OK, first, let's dispense with the tired stereotype of the absent-minded, romantically clueless male, running to the card shop at the last minute to load up on armfulls of roses and chocolates and find that perfect paper sentiment that expresses his undying love in a way he never could. Or diamonds, when he comes to understand that isn't enough. Shall we? There were two other people buying cards with me today, and neither of them were male.

I'd rather not buy into the whole, "if you love me, you'll cut down those living flowers so I can watch them die in front of me, then I want you to exploit children and poor people at the behest of an African warlord so I can have a rare, shiny rock, and make sure you purchase someone else's measured sentiments from the industry responsible for making you feel worthless for not participating," thing.

The chocolates are tasty, though.

I have memories of being in grammar school, and cutting and gluing the same manufactured sentiments for my classmates they were compositing for me. Many of the 3-4-year-olds in my son's class worked on similar sentiments. Admittedly, there's a big, "aww" moment when your preschooler throws his arms out and yells, "happy valentime's [sic] day!"

Call me a purist, but the purpose of the day honoring St. Valentine is to celebrate romantic love. Not, "I love you, man," love. I'm not any more comfortable with my 3-yr-old son expressing romantic feelings for the girls in his preschool than for the boys. It's just not appropriate.

I love my family. I love my son. My wife gets Valentine's Day cards.

Yeah, I know a lot of people use the occasion to express their, shall we say, less romantic feelings for the people close to them. But I'm not eager to meet the father who's expecting the, "Be my Valentine, Dad" card that I saw today from his son.

a parent's worst nightmare

2010-02-09T10:37:00.001-05:00

From Australia, but it happens here (US) with frightening regularity

clipped from www.dadsontheair.net

Department of Child Stealing

a distraught father who has spent the past 13 years desperately trying to have his son returned to his care and protection, following the boys’ removal from his parents’ care

on the bases of allegations of abuse and neglect, which were subsequently proven to be false.

Again our own investigations show the frightening speed and ease by which your biological children can be removed from your care, by any of these government agencies on the basis of the flimsiest of evidence, unsupported hearsay or vindictive false allegations.

the governments’ own reports show that tens of thousands of the nation’s children are removed from one or more of their parents every year with the help of a number of government agencies

More questions urgently need to be asked in order to establish the possible underlying causes for such a disturbing high level of government involvement in the child stealing racket that appears to be taking place.

Beaten Census

2010-02-06T09:36:00.001-05:00

though technically (barely) legal, it's intentionally deceptive. What's your opinion of intentionally deceptive fund raisers?

Would you give them money, even if you agree in principle, when you know they're disingenuous?

What's your opinion of the people who are intentionally deceptive to get your money? Are they likely to be deceitful in other areas?

clipped from www.politico.com

RNC 'census' mailer draws fire

Calling itself the “Congressional District Census,” the letter comes in an envelope starkly printed with the words, “DO NOT DESTROY OFFICIAL DOCUMENT” and describes itself, on the outside of the envelope, as a “census document.”

Even some who have been involved with the program, however, acknowledged that it walks the line.

"Of course, duping people is the point. ... That's one of the reasons why it works so well,” said one Republican operative familiar with the program, who said it’s among the RNC’s most lucrative fundraising initiatives. “They will likely mail millions this year [with] incredible targeting.”

the same mailing in 2000, during that year’s census, and Maloney and Clay asked the postmaster general to open an investigation into whether the mailings violate the Deceptive Mail Prevention and Enforcement Act

Blowhard Christian Soldiers

2010-02-02T16:35:00.001-05:00

The only "social responsibility" of a Christian is to live, wherever and with whomever he may be, the life of faith, for his own salvation and as an example to others. If, in so doing, we help to ameliorate or abolish a social evil, that is a good thing - but that is not our goal. If we become desperate when our life and our words fail to convert others to the true Kingdom, that comes from lack of faith. If we would live our faith more deeply, we would need to speak of it less.

Bl. Seraphim Rose

From Letters from Father Seraphim, Nikodemos Orthodox Publication Society, Richfield Springs, NY, 2001. A letter to Thomas Merton. (via my friend Huw)

It occurred to me how ironic it was that political candidates were able to garner millions of dollars in contributions, but we can't seem to find the money to help the truly needy. The irony was the candidates who claim to represent "Christian values" with $400 hair cuts.

I was thinking about how one church could raise over $300,000 in collections from its members in order to sponsor legislation that would deny the same rights they enjoy from couples for being of the same gender.

I was thinking about how that same, Christian, enthusiasm could have feed, clothed and housed more than a few people.

I was also questioning how many Christian ideals are being expressed in response to the recent disaster in Haiti.

I then wonder how many who would call themselves Christian are against providing health care to those who cannot afford it. Not only do they not want to see anyone else "enriched" from their, Christian labor, they fear health care in too short supply to risk sharing it with others, lest they not get what is theirs.

I cannot hold fault with Christianity as a faith for the way some choose to practice it. That's the same as hating a football team because of the actions of some of its fans. (Which some seem to have to quarrel with.)

The message I get from Jesus, as portrayed in the Bible, is forgive everyone; love everyone, even your enemies; have compassion for every one and every thing and help everyone when you can. But then I'm not a Biblical scholar. I've not even read the Bible. I still think I have a better understanding of Yeshua of Nazareth's teachings than most who claim to have a personal relationship with him. It makes me think they've not read any more of the book than I have.

man up, or shut up

2010-01-14T11:46:00.001-05:00

Carville... didn't he make cakes?

clipped from punkrockhr.com

Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities

We never have honest discussions as Americans. If we did, we would talk about how the system is rigged. We are fooled into fighting over divisive cultural issues that aren’t all that divisive to anyone under 40, but we are never asked to weigh in on important issues like national security and foreign policy. We can’t get a fair shake and be involved in shaping our own economic destinies because the people in power have us arguing amongst ourselves over a smaller & smaller piece of the economic pie.

The change we seek won’t come from Obama, the GOP, or anyone on television who profits from the status quo. The revolution will come from you

Dear Politician: (an open letter you may cut & paste)

2010-01-13T14:11:00.001-05:00

Dear Elected Member of the Democratic Party:

I probably voted for you in the past election. Not because I like you, but because the other candidate most likely to win was an option I would not be able to tolerate.

I won't make that mistake again.

I could have voted my conscience, but we both know picking any other candidate would have the same ultimate effect of writing in someone I actually I thought could represent me. I chose, instead, to vote against the one I thought would do the most harm, by casting a ballot for the one whom I believed would do less harm, but would prevent the worst from happening.

It was akin to voting on which finger to get cut off. (Go ahead, pick.)

I usually say, "it's like being told you're getting a vote on getting a sharp stick in the eye, and showing up and finding the choices are 'right' and 'left.'"

But I feel in this case it's finding out they're holding a vote on cutting off one of your fingers, and you'd really like to say, "pinky," because you don't play piano and can count on one hand anyway, but you find the vote is open to a lot of other people, and most of them are voting either "thumb" or "index."

I'm sure they have their reasons for their choices - maybe they dislike the way you point your index finger at them, or the things to which you give your thumbs up, and maybe they all think it's the other fingers that are necessary, for observing marriage, rational discourse and having something you can extend whilst sipping tea - but, damnit, if you had to pick just one of those two, you'd really rather it was one and not the other.

And so you try to influence the decision in whatever small way you can.

I'm a registered Republican. Mostly because whenever I try to talk sense to someone who cannot see reason, and they counter logic with name-calling, staring in with, "you whinny, liberal, socialist..." I can say, "what do you mean? I'm a Republican." I do believe in small, responsible government. I don't like a government that wastes the funds its given, nor violates the trust of protection of its citizens. That is why I cannot vote for most of the candidates in the current Republican Party. They are not interested in a republic, they are fascists.

I believe this country is made up of resources, and for it to remain strong, those resources need to be protected for future generations. One of the country's strongest resources is its people, for a country is nothing if not the people that make it up. They need protecting as well.

That is why we have governments - to protect people from those that would do them harm.

I'm changing my party affiliation to Democrat. Again, not because I like you. So I can make whatever small gesture I can to ensure you, and people like you, represent the real will of the people - more that you have the interests of the people in mind - when you do the job you are being paid to do, or you will find yourself out of a job.

As I said, I cannot vote for those who have corrupted the party of Lincoln and Roosevelt, creating a circus of hatred and anti-intellectualism, all to obscure their giving of the country itself away to corporate greed. To the extent that you continue to work with them, I cannot vote for you, either. I'm changing my affiliation so I can vote against you in the next Democratic primary.

No amount of special interest cash-funded ads will dissuade me that you've sold my interests to them. You may think you're getting more votes by getting their support, but you sure as hell are losing mine.

Right twice a day

2010-01-06T13:55:00.001-05:00

My wife is complaining about her new watch - which happens to be my watch. That it was once mine gives her license to speak disparagingly about it.

"This watch is crap." As is everything that is or once was mine, including my new smartphone (on which I'm writing this), one of our cars and our computer. While the computer was financed jointly, as resident geek it is my duty to maintain it. So, even though she has her own login, settings, applications, etc., and even though I can usually use it without issue, when something isn't working as well or as fast as it should, it's crap.

The issue with my... her new watch is the date window. She says the date doesn't advance at midnight like it should.

"Is it advancing at all?" I ask with the voice of an experienced help desk analyst.

"Yes, but it's advancing in the middle of the day, not at midnight."

"So you're saying the date is advancing at noon, not at midnight?"

"Yes."

I had to repeat that at least once more before it started to sink in. I eventually got a "shut up" out of her, as she started to reset the watch.

You bailed out my mistake, I deserve a bonus for that

2010-01-04T16:29:00.001-05:00

we (you, I, us, the taxpayers) gave the "too big to fail" banks our money so they wouldn't collapse, collapse under their own weight from their own mistakes created by their own greed, and now that they're solvent again, they're rewarding themselves for the fuck up, instead of paying us back

clipped from open.salon.com

2009 closed with the stock market rebounding 61 percent from its March lows, and “Wall Street is ready to pat itself on the back for its huge gains with big bonuses,” potentially surpassing the record payouts of 2007.

Wall Street’s 2009 bonus pool could total $200 billion

the return to big bonuses will also allow Wall Street banks to claim billions in tax breaks:

Many American banks already pay minuscule federal income taxes,

the payout-related breaks will reduce their tax bills further

Altogether, the top three Wall Street banks — Goldman Sachs, JPMorgan Chase and Morgan Stanley — will gain nearly $20 billion in tax breaks based on their employee compensation this year.

Compensation related tax deductions will total about $80 billion across Wall Street,

In 2008, Goldman Sachs paid an effective tax rate of just 1 percent

NOT ONE OF THE BANKSTERS WHO COMMITTED THE FRAUD THAT CREATED THE MORTGAGE CRISIS HAS GONE TO JAIL.

I won't suffer, so you must

2010-01-04T16:28:00.001-05:00

explain to me again why the entity you manage isn't doing as well as it should, and I'm the one who has to take the income hit

clipped from open.salon.com

take to the streets and demand adequate funding for our children’s education instead of Wall Street bailouts and wars,

economic hard times are precisely when workers need – and are motivated – to fight hardest in order to avoid being victimized and forced to bear the entire burden.

workers in the private sector should demand that the company open its books and let the workers’ representatives determine for themselves how much the company is taking in, and where the money is going.

Public sector workers who are asked to “share the pain” should demand that the money used to bail out Wall Street bankers and bomb civilian women and children

be used instead to pay government workers decent wages to deliver public services.

strong enough to force the bosses to share the benefits of the post-World War II economic boom with US workers, raising their standard of living to the highest in the world.

The lessons of the militant labor union struggles of the prewar era must be relearned, and soon.

would you cut off your arm to save your leg?

2010-01-04T16:27:00.001-05:00

to get what we got, what do we have to give up? What if that's not acceptable?

clipped from open.salon.com

scared to death that, because they perceive limited health care benefits pie, it's they who are going to lose their slice in order to accommodate other's fair shares

Why do we pay for war, to kill people, to kill our own, and balk to preserve health?

Please add this to your essential reading list today. I thank you. Let's see how far this bill gets

I deserve health care, you don't

2010-01-04T11:05:00.001-05:00

that's a paraphrase, but given comments from a certain drug-addicted blowhard, an accurate sentiment

clipped from www.huffingtonpost.com

Limbaugh Lauds (Socialist) Medical Care in Hawaii

I received no special treatment."

in Hawaii, no one gets special treatment, because everyone can get it.

all Members of Congress that have a medical office paid for by taxpayers

Dick Cheney who had socialist pacemakers implanted paid for by the government, and George W who had a government-paid socialist colonoscopy while in office.

Members of Congress over 65 get single-payer socialist medical care from Medicare.

Hawaii

nearly-universal

since 1974.

the costs of everything

the highest in the nation,

health care premiums in Hawaii,

are nearly the lowest and their costs per medicare beneficiary are the lowest in the nation.

Rush does not live in Hawaii and so his costs are not covered

having that "socialist" system for more than 3 decades has not reduced the quality of the care he received.

Rush appears to have survived his encounter with socialist medical care.

If Hawaii-style medical care is good enough for Rush Limbaugh, it is good enough for me.

do who I say, not what I do

2009-12-30T12:09:00.001-05:00

in closing: "I've long thought that the solution to the cheap, cost-free moralizing that leads very upstanding people like Karl Rove to want to ban same-sex marriages (which they don't want to enter into themselves, and thus cost them nothing) is to have those same "principles" apply consistently to all marriage laws. If Karl Rove, Newt Gingrich, Rush Limbaugh and their friends and followers actually were required by law to stay married to their wives -- the way that "traditional marriage" was generally supposed to work -- the movement to have our secular laws conform to "traditional marriage" principles would almost certainly die a quick, quiet and well-deserved death."

http://www.facebook.com/home.php?ref=home#/pages/2010-California-Protection-of-Marriage-Act/

clipped from www.salon.com

Rove: Champion of "traditional" divorce

By Glenn Greenwald

an outspoken opponent of same-sex marriage, citing "5,000 years of understanding the institution of marriage" as his justification. He also famously engineered multiple referenda to incorporate a ban on same-sex marriage into various states' constitutions

Texas' "no-fault" divorce law,

basically allows any married couple to simply end their marriage because they feel like it.

one of the states which has constitutionally barred same-sex marriages, and has a Governor who explicitly cites Christian dogma as the reason to support that provision, yet the overwhelming majority of Texan citizens make sure that there's nothing in the law making their own marriages binding or permanent -- i.e., traditional. They're willing to limit other people's marriage choices on moral grounds, but not their own, and thus have a law that lets them divorce whenever the mood strikes.

Win, or go home.

2009-12-23T12:48:00.004-05:00

Anyone who's ever watched a football game, seen one team completely dominate the other in total offensive yardage, yet still lose the game, can understand why the current health care bill(s) being debated need to be fixed.

Most legislators, on the other side, understand the purpose of the game is to win - not both sides working together to rack up as many points for each other as they can.

I don't care what Harry Reid says, that the current legislation, as it's written, does a lot to fix what's broken. It does. A little. But too little. It is unacceptable in its current form. Agreeing to implement it is giving up.

"Gee, you guys played a pretty good first half, how about we call it a draw?"

If the other side cheats, uses sneaky, underhanded tricks to sway the game their way, you can't sit and cry that the ref didn't call it - you just have to play that much harder.

This isn't little league - both sides won't get trophies for just showing up. No one is going to congratulate you on game well-played, cheer you for scoring, no matter the outcome.

To my senators and congressmen: play well, or be traded next year.

What would Jesus buy?

2009-12-16T12:09:00.001-05:00

Does Black Friday mean more to you than Good Friday?

Why are we upset that a retailer doesn't evangelize?

clipped from news.yahoo.com

Christian Group Launches New Attack on Christmas Commercialism

"Christians get all bent out of shape over the fact that someone didn't say 'Merry Christmas' when I walked into the store. But why are we expecting the store to tell our story?

Advent Conspiracy churches have donated millions of dollars to dig wells in developing countries through Living Water International and other organizations.

a fraction of the money Americans spend at retailers in the month of December could supply the entire world with clean water.

one in which people spent a little less and thought a little more, expressing their love through something more meaningful than a gift card.

A movement like the Advent Conspiracy is countercultural on two fronts - not just fighting the secular idea that Christmas is a month-long shopping and decorating ritual, but the powerful conservative notion that the holiday requires acknowledgement from the nation's retailers to be truly meaningful.

father & son

2009-12-12T21:03:00.001-05:00

father & son

Who says we need reform?

2009-12-11T10:03:00.001-05:00

Wife's premiums went up 55%, co-pays doubled, have 10% "co-insurance", deductible doubled. Now paying $6k/yr for $8k max payout.

Luckily we're not required to have ins. Wait, what? Well, at least we'll have public health care. Oh, about that...

clipped from www.salon.com

Meet your new health insurance company overlords

we still end up with a system that's based on private insurers that have no incentive whatsoever to control their costs

A system based on private insurers won't control costs because private insurers barely compete against each other.

you'd think the insurance industry would be subject to the antitrust laws

the Senate bill still keeps Big Insurance safe from competition by preserving its privileged exemption from the antitrust laws.

From the start, opponents of the public option have wanted to portray it as big government preying upon the market, and private insurers as the embodiment of the market. But it's just the reverse. Private insurers are exempt from competition.

Without some mechanism forcing private insurers to compete, we're going to end up with a national healthcare system that's controlled by a handful of very large corporations accountable neither to American voters nor to the market.

Well just pound me in the ass and call me fish

2009-12-08T14:09:00.003-05:00

Homemade shiv not included.

Seriously. Is this what you want your kids playing with (rated T, 13+)?

I sometimes think the various "Dope Wars" and "Mafia" games on Facebook, and certainly the likes of "Grand Theft Auto" are in bad taste (scoring points for engaging in criminal activity), but is this any better? I don't know if they're related to all the other "tycoon" games out there (Railway Tycoon, et al.) but this is going too far.

Or is it?

From the game description: "Private prisons have become the new growth industry." Unfortunately, that's true. And herein is the underlying problem. The description goes on: "You will construct and run an efficient rehabilitation facility with nothing but money on your mind." [emphasis added]

You are clearly not concerned with "rehabilitation" when there's "nothing but money on your mind."

News flash, folks: this is not a game - this is currently going on in this country in the real world. The US ranks 1st in the world in per capita prison population. That is, we put more of our citizens behind bars than any other modern nation. Why? Because we're inherently so bad? Because we're so much better than the rest of the world at fighting crime? Or because it's in the financial interests of a select few?

We're building prisons at a frightening rate - and still the ones we have are grossly overcrowded. We have a drug policy that puts teens in the hole until they're middle aged for having the audacity to get high. I could go on. I'll only mention tangentially the conspiracy theory about the plans to lock up large segments of the US population - like we did to the Japanese American citizens during the onset of WWII - during an imminently anticipated "civil unrest." Good thing we don't protest any more.

[CD-ROM Game - PRISON TYCOON.]

Hershey's Packaging Perfectly Contradicts Itself - mediabistro.com: AgencySpy

2009-12-08T11:23:00.002-05:00

From the post: "It's bad enough that Hershey's has the audacity to make health-benefit claims on a bottle containing chocolate syrup. But by some oddity of logic, the nutrition facts lists the daily calcium percentage at "0%". During a recession, flat is the new up?"

via: Hershey's Packaging Perfectly Contradicts Itself - mediabistro.com: AgencySpy

what's wrong with mergers?

2009-12-07T22:11:00.001-05:00

if it's so bad, why haven't we read anything about it?
</sarcasm>

clipped from www.salon.com

Sure, NBC's Hulu is awesome -- but now Comcast is set to own Hulu. And free television online is not part of Comcast's business model. And Comcast is how 16 million American households connect to the Internet.

Comcast is determined to prevent the watch-whatever-you-want-free future.

massive cable companies that control broadband access to the Net for millions of Americans actually can affect the variety of options available to entertainment consumers

Do only idiots pay for cable?

War, on Christmas

2009-12-07T13:31:00.001-05:00

"No less was Nicholas known for his zeal for the truth. He was present at the First Ecumenical Council of the 318 Fathers at Nicaea in 325; upon hearing the blasphemies that Arius brazenly uttered against the Son of God, Saint Nicholas struck him on the face. Since the canons of the Church forbid the clergy to strike any man at all, his fellow bishops were in perplexity what disciplinary action was to be taken against this hierarch whom all revered. In the night our Lord Jesus Christ and our Lady Theotokos appeared to certain of the bishops, informing them that no action was to be taken against him, since he had acted not out of passion, but extreme love and piety."

clipped from raphael.doxos.com

War on Christmas

St Nicholas, the Bishop of Myra, was too deeply engrossed in the teachings of Jesus, the man who went to his death offering no defense, the man who said “turn the other cheek.

only later do we need to imagine a Bishop punching a heretic in the face and Mary and Jesus blessing him for it.

And a lot of folks want to imagine our bishops or clergy or laity should be doing this now: punching infidels in the face.

Truth is: we can’t make that relationship happen by punching others in the face, by beating them up in arguments, by forcing them in to the corner with laws, by hitting them over the head with a Bible or an icon.

This will stand before the throne of God on judgement day and say, “They knew I was your disciple because I made shop girls say ‘Merry Christmas’ to me after I purchased $500 of toys and blue jeans in the Mall”.

Personally, I’m happier the further “Merry Christmas” gets from Wal*Mart, the Mall and Amazon.com.

Tip: "emergency" buttons on smart phones

2009-11-20T16:16:00.001-05:00

You may or may not have taught your youngsters how (and why) to dial 9-1-1 (and to not practice it - sorry, local PD). It's a very good idea to do so. However it's one thing to teach 2-4-yr-olds how to operate a push-button phone (assuming they know which buttons are which). It's quite another to get them to navigate multiple touch screens on the newest smartphones to even get to the dialer window. A lot of adults I know can't manage this.

The Lock Screen (and eventually, an ambulance) to the rescue.

My phone, a T-Mobile G-1 (not an endorsement of their product or service), has a lock screen - a privacy/security feature whereby you have to input a pattern or code to be able to access the phone. (I'm told the iPhone has this as well.) In case of emergency - when you can't, in a panic, remember the pattern, or you're incapacitated and some samaritan is trying to call help on your phone - there is a single button to get to the dialer, where it only connects to emergency numbers.

We were recently reinforcing to our 3-yr-old son the hows and whys of calling for help. My wife got one of those new phones that has a full QWERTY keyboard instead of a dedicated number pad. We're still working on 6 vs. 9, so throwing a bunch of letter keys on top of everything didn't clear up any confusion. We turned to my phone, and realized that, "press the green button with the phone picture," doesn't always open to the dial pad - sometimes contacts, sometimes call log.

I had turned my lock screen off, because I felt it too much of a bother to use each time I wanted to access the phone. When I first enabled it, allowing my son to entertain himself with the new "game" of drawing lines between the dots on the screen, I was sure to instruct him to never press "the white button with the red cross" (at least not any more) - that it was for calling for help, if someone was hurt, or there was a fire. I've since turned the lock back on, for this very reason. It's one button that my son can access and enables him to dial 9-1-1 in an emergency.

Tip: Cell phone as stand-in travel night light

2009-11-20T16:05:00.003-05:00

We frequently do overnights at Grandma & Grandpa's house, but we often neglect to take a night light.

Solution: mobile phone.

It occurred to me one day as I was leaving my phone charging, powered on, that it emitted enough light to illuminate the room, just barely.

Our son simply cannot go to sleep in total darkness - plus, as a grown up, it helps to see where you're going when navigating the luggage and toys in the spare room, plus navigate to the bathroom in the middle of the night.

Many phones have advanced features, such as being able to power themselves off after a set time (if you only want it while the little ones fall asleep, but not all night), besides doubling as an alarm clock.

You know who else prayed that their god would smite their political enemies?

2009-11-18T17:11:00.001-05:00

from the comments: So if a Muslim, quoting the Qu'ran, preaches violence against Americans, he's a terrorist.

But if a Christian hides behind the Bible to call for the assassination of the President, that's okay?

clipped from gawker.com

Christian Conservatives Praying for God to Kill Obama

There's a hilarious new meme in the wingnut sectors of the internet: someone's coined a bumper sticker slogan encouraging people to pray for Barack Obama. But here's the funny part: it's really a secret Christian code for "Kill the President!'

Psalm 109 is known as "A Cry for Vengeance," which is one of the foundational values of Christianity, along with small-business tax cuts.

The Psalm 109:8 gag is one in what's becoming a long line of cheekily coded Obama death threats: There was the classified ad someone placed in a Pennsylvania paper hoping that he follows in "the footsteps of Lincoln, Garfield, McKinley, and Kennedy," all of whom were assassinated. And there was the gun-toting New Hampshire teabagger with a sign saying it is time to "water the tree of liberty"—a reference to Thomas Jefferson's reminder that the tree of liberty must be watered from time to time with the "blood of tyrants and patriots."

2010 California Marriage Protection Act | Safeguarding marriage from the evils of divorce

2009-11-17T16:34:00.001-05:00

2010 California Marriage Protection Act | Safeguarding marriage from the evils of divorce.

Best. Cause. Ever.

Seems some would like to choose from the scriptures like it was a buffet.

pointless to follow the news of the war(s)

2009-11-09T11:05:00.001-05:00

clipped from stuartbuck.blogspot.com

C.S. Lewis on Wartime News and Newspapers in General

to strive to master what will be contradicted the next day, to fear and hope intensely on shaky evidence, is surely an ill use of the mind.

Most of what he remembers he will therefore have to unlearn;

My insurance company wants to sue my 3-yr-old

2009-11-04T13:53:00.004-05:00

In an effort to not have to pay the ER bill I incurred, Captial BlueCross is suggesting I go after my preschooler for the money.

Let me explain. One nice, quiet, peaceful summer evening, as I was putting my then 2-year-old son to bed, he retaliated by sending me to the emergency room.

OK, not exactly, it wasn't intentional (so he says), but he threw his head back, straight into my mouth, splitting my lip open vertically across my unstraightened teeth.

After the blood stopped gushing, I gathered the courage to examine the inside of my lower lip, discovering it split almost completely through to the other side. Opened up just like, well, a pair of lips.

When I got to the ER, I explained to the admitting/intake clerk what happened - that my son's head struck my face, splitting my lip open. She shook her head, took notes, gave me a bracelet and told me to have a seat.

As an aside, it occurred to me as I waited that anyone who opposes state-run medical facilities for fear of having to wait to see a doctor has never actually been to an "emergency" room. No, I was not in mortal peril - it was evening, and a weekend, so there would be no GP to consult. Still, I waited most of the evening to see someone.

I eventually did see the triage nurse. He took a look inside my mouth and concluded I would require stitches. When he asked how I came to have this injury, I reiterated the above story. He was amused, but not unsympathetic.

I was then admitted inside, and proceeded to wait further to see another medical professional. An attending nurse prepped the room, pulling out all manner of instruments for suturing deep lacerations. And then I waited some more.

Eventually a doctor's assistant (I believe - in any case someone capable of attending to my injury and making a qualified examination thereof) came in and said that my lip had mostly healed already (!!). I could have stitches if I wanted, but that itself would be painful, and that area of the mouth heals very quickly (I didn't think I had waited that long). So off I went back home, with my discharge papers, new bracelet and an ER co-pay bill in my hand.

To the point of this story, I did tell the attending doctor('s assistant) the same story about how my lip came to be that way.

Months go by, and I get the Explanation of Benefits from CBC. They're denying payment, because they've come to believe that the injury was the result of an auto accident (?). They suggest filing a claim against my auto policy.

The part of my brain that believes conspiracy theories wondered if they were trying to weasel out of paying - "clearly the nature of your injuries suggests they were sustained in an automobile accident" - but having a wife who works in the health care field, I understand how someone could write down the wrong code on a form, and my injury could be misclassified. I call to clear up the confusion.

The clerk I spoke with was more than pleasant. He, like everyone, was amused at my retelling of how my son came to bust me in the mouth. He said he would make the proper notations, and that would be it.

Always be wary when someone in that position says something like that.

I've just now gotten a letter - a form to fill out, actually - an "Other Party Liability Report." My "contract contains a Subrogation provision that includes the right of recovery for benefits provided when a third party has first payment responsibility." In other words, tell us who's responsible, so we can go after them for the money.

They want to know if it was (again) the result of an auto accident, or was work-related. Under "Section 2 - Complete this section if another person or party was responsible for the injury/illness," it asks, "has or will the person file a claim against the responsible person or the insurance company?" Then it asks for their insurance information - uncuriously, it's the same as mine. It then asks if I've retained an attorney.

No, I wasn't planning on suing someone with the same last name who lives at the same address, who's on my insurance policy. Yes, I know forms like these often get kicked out automatically by "the system" and that they're usually applicable, but considering everyone involved should know by now how it happened, I shouldn't have to explain it again.

The Bad Sleep Well

2009-11-04T10:52:00.001-05:00

the title of an old Japanese movie, in case you were wondering how anyone at Bank of America could sleep at night. Thousands of loans where both the lender and the borrower could have been helped by modification end up in foreclosure anyway. Ever wonder why?

clipped from open.salon.com

“According to my records there were no attempts by Bank of America to reach me,” I assert. He tells me according to his records I’m incorrect so I ask for specific dates and times of these alleged attempts to reach me. “We don’t keep a log of those,” he responds

I could go around in circles all day with this guy bending his absence of critical thoughts into origami baseball bats and beating him senseless with them but I see no point.

Foreclosure: Staring Down the Barrel of a Loan Mod Ray Gun

Define "pre-existing"

2009-11-03T12:10:00.000-05:00

John 1 (Americans 0):

(via crosswalk.com)

ı In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. 2 He was in the beginning with God. 3 All things came into being through him, and without him not one thing came into being. What has come into being 4 in him was life, and the life was the light of all people.

I can have been in multiple auto accidents - causing all of them through my own faults - have had my driving privilege revoked (temporarily), and still be able to purchase (government mandated) auto insurance (albeit at a higher cost).

I can purchase a home in southern California and many agencies would still sell me flood, mudslide and fire insurance, though it would be more costly than for someone in, say, Montana.

The point is, I could get it.

How does, "sorry, you had that before you got here," only apply when you're paying for medical care?

If I'm a woman and I've had a C-section or been the victim of domestic abuse, or if I was born with a congenital health issue and turn 18 and am no longer covered under my parents' plan, under all the circumstances I can find myself unable to acquire health insurance. They just won't sell it to me.

Or, having an insurance policy, if I change jobs and get a new employer-sponsored health plan or my current employer changes providers, or again am the above woman, I can, legally, be denied payment for necessary treatments.

Sometimes we need to pay for conditions we already have. And if we're paying for "just in case," we expect the case to be paid for, should the time arise.

Without payment there is no treatment. Without treatment, there is severe illness and death. And we allow this to go on.

The idea that something could have existed in some form before it became manifest is a debate for theologians, philosophers and quantum physicists. Not politicians and lobbyists. And if more insurers employed more theologians and philosophers, there wouldn't be much of a debate at all.

Word.

Glenn Beck, Super Genius

2009-10-22T12:54:00.001-04:00

Why do we continue to watch beck? For the same reason we continue to watch Wile E. Coyote. Both are perceived as evil (the coyote is, after all, just trying to eat), both keep coming up with more and more outlandish means to accomplish their ends, both are not taken seriously by their main adversaries (the only time the road runner even acknowledges the coyote is when he has to step out of the way), and both of them are doomed to failure.

And so we can't turn away. They keep trying, they keep failing, and we keep watching that failure, every party wondering who among them will be the least persistent and eventually give up.

Unlike the coyote (who somehow can afford - and find for purchase - rocket skates, but not a cheeseburger), Beck wants you to watch - that's his purpose. The more outrageous he gets, the more people go, "oh no he di'int," and tune in.

And unlike the emaciated coyote, Beck knows where his next meal is coming from.

(via Salon.com: Progressives are like slave owners; and LA Times: Slavery was a liberal cause.)

Lost Generation

2009-10-20T15:28:00.006-04:00

You simply must see this video. I came across it through friends on Facebook.

While listening to the message, it's easy to be blown away by the way in which it's presented. Technical and editorial feats aside, go back and listen to the message.

Reminiscent of "Wear Sunscreen," ("Advice, like youth, probably just wasted on the young" written by Mary Schmich and published in the Chicago Tribune as a column in 1997, not Kurt Vonnegut) I suspect it'll be the subject of more than one graduation ceremony.

Vote already, dammit! This is why "reform" will never happen.

2009-10-14T13:12:00.001-04:00

Kidney stones are passed easier than health care reform. This is why I can't stand the Democrats. They're trying to compromise, and the Republicans want only capitulation. They want [i]nothing[/] done that doesn't heap more profit on private insurers.

clipped from www.huffingtonpost.com

Mike Enzi, Gang Of Six Republican, Admits He's Simply Blocking Health Care Reform

Mike Enzi, one of three Republicans ostensibly negotiating health care reform as part of the Senate's "Gang of Six," told a Wyoming town hall crowd that he had no plans to compromise with Democrats and was merely trying to extract concessions.

He assured conservatives that his presence was delaying health care reform.

"If I hadn't been involved in this process as long as I have and to the depth as I have, you would already have national health care," he said.

Sen. Jeff Bingaman of New Mexico, said that he would support passing health care with a simple majority if it became clear the GOP wasn't serious.

Cutting Out Coupons

2009-09-29T19:35:00.001-04:00

I came to a realization today as I was making my turkey sandwich for lunch. When I was adding the salami (what, you don't put salami on your turkey sandwiches?) I looked at the price tag and started to do some math--see, I bought the store brand over the name brand because it was $1.50/lb. cheaper. (woo-hoo!) Net savings: 40¢.

That's when I started thinking about all the other things that are supposed to save me money but aren't actually worth it.

My wife and I decided a couple weeks ago that it's OK to use credit cards to buy gas again. Yes, there's a higher price (and why that's tolerated, if not illegal, is beyond me--try that in any other retail establishment) but the difference to fill the 10-gallon tank on my Corolla is 60¢ extra on a near $30 purchase.

One of the reasons I like using cards is I get to download the activity into Quicken and keep track of my spending. Having to [remember to] collect all the receipts and enter all the info manually or, worse, having to write down or remember every purchase is something I'm just not going to do. (I'm lazy that way.) To me, it's a nominal fee for the convenience.

Plus, there's a bunch of rewards cards that offer up to 2% cash back on purchases--like gas--which offset some if not all of the cost.

Now, there are research studies which say that people tend to spend more when they use plastic over pulling tangible cash out of their pockets. But I'm not heading out to the mall for back to school clothes, I need gas. Spending this way just requires a little discipline (which I don't have).

This lack of discipline is why I'm only taking cash the next time the wife and I go to Costco. We can't seem to get out of there for under $100. Go in for some food and cleaning supplies, and come out with an XBox, 2 coats, 4 pairs of pants and a new coffee machine. Oh, sure, they were cheap, but until we saw the ridiculously low prices, we weren't in the market for them. You also have to be able to recognize a bargain when you see one. The toilet paper was half the price of the supermarket, but now I need a place to store 72 rolls in a two-bedroom condo. If you're not buying for the football team picnic or stocking your underground bunker, you probably don't need the two 20-lb. vats of peanut butter or mayonnaise.

You need to do a cost-benefit analysis. Figure out the cost per square foot of your home, then figure out if that space is best suited for saving a few bucks on condiments. Also, how much do you make an hour that you'll take the time to clip and organize 25¢ coupons and have it worth your while?

I think it was Gary Marcus in his book Kluge, when talking about failures in reasoning, who points out that most of us would drive across town to save $25 on a $50 toaster, but wouldn't bother to save $25 on a $2500 flat screen TV. We reason (or, rather, fail to) it's about percentages, that 10% isn't enough of a savings for the effort, when really we should be deciding if $25 is enough to drive across town - either it is, or it isn't.

My wife just found a new job; I just lost one. (I didn't really lose it--I still know where it is, I just don't go there anymore.) Finding ways to save money is important to us. We stopped buying organic milk and eggs, which were twice and up to three times more expensive, respectively. But combing through circulars for an hour or two to save 40¢ on substandard cold cuts?

If they win, YOU LOSE

2009-09-23T10:55:00.001-04:00

Dear friend:

If the insurance companies win, you lose.

If reform passes without the choice of a public health insurance option, if insurers can keep denying care for pre-existing conditions, and if you can't afford health insurance, the insurance companies will keep making money while you will keep losing out. It's really that simple.

We must fight back.

Today, thousands of people across the country are taking the fight directly to the insurance companies. We'll be presenting the insurance companies with a list of demands: Stop denying our care and stop using our premiums to lobby against health reform.

Click below to fax your insurance company these demands. A copy will be sent to the Senate Finance Committee who are starting debate on the Baucus Bill today:

http://healthcareforamericanow.org/page/speakout/sick

For years the insurance companies have expanded their total stranglehold over health care. They make record profits. The make life-and-death decisions. And they're spending millions of dollars on campaign contributions and lobbyists to defeat reform - over $770,000 per day!

That's your money they're spending to defeat health care reform and the choice of a public health insurance option.

You're a customer and a person with a voice, so you can fight back. Click below to fax your demands to the insurance industry and join thousands who are doing the same thing today:

http://healthcareforamericanow.org/page/speakout/sick

Your message will get to your insurer, your Members of Congress, and Members of the Senate Finance Committee, who are starting to work on the Baucus Bill - a bill that gives the insurance industry everything it wants.

Thank you for fighting back against the insurance industry - the real enemy in this debate.

Let's clog up their fax machines! Click here:
http://healthcareforamericanow.org/page/speakout/sick

With your help, we'll be the ones who will win.

Thanks!

No Compromise

2009-09-10T12:49:00.001-04:00

my 3-yr-old understands negotiation better

clipped from pol.moveon.org

Pass Obama's health care plan

Last night, President Obama challenged Congress to "meet history's test" and finally fix our broken health care system. He pledged to seek common ground between Democrats and Republicans, and assured them all: "My door is always open."

Republicans responded by heckling, booing, and hissing. Rep. Joe Wilson (R-SC) screamed out "You lie!" as the President defended his health care plan against false right-wing attacks.

We can't afford to let right-wing extremists like Joe Wilson hold health care reform hostage. As Obama put it, "the time for games has passed. Now is the season for action." Let's send a message to Congress, demanding swift action to pass real health care reform.

A compiled petition with your individual comment will be presented to your senators and representative.

Why does Hitler get such a bad rap?

2009-09-08T11:24:00.001-04:00

But then why do people try to equate Obama to Hitler, if he was such a nice guy, Pat?

clipped from www.mediabistro.com

First They Came For The Nazi Apologists...

If only the powers that be at msnbc.com understood that Adolph Hitler actually was a man of peace, they wouldn't have acted so rashly in removing their site's link to a Pat Buchanan column essentially blaming England for World War II.

no worthy news organization should employ a commentator who engages in such vile fiction.

if you want to read Buchanan's column ("Did Hitler Want War?"), written to commemorate the 70th anniversary of Germany's invasion of Poland, it's here (screen shot below). Be ready, though: It truly is a litany of lunacy.

You can't fix stupid

2009-09-03T00:04:00.001-04:00

for me, “I don’t think evolution should be associated with our school" says it all

oh, and I really want one of those shirts - brilliant marketing, if you asked me

clipped from thinkprogress.org

Missouri school district bans t-shirts for acknowledging evolution.

“I don’t think evolution should be associated with our school.”

Law professor Jonathan Turley notes, “Evolution is not a religious issue. Extremists want to make evolution into a religious question, but it is not.”

“I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use.”

All holidays! All the time!

2009-07-31T13:35:00.001-04:00

I'm going caroling at the pool, dressing up and going trick-or-treating for Labor Day and baking pumpkin pie in April. From the people who bring you Back to School sales in June - this is worse.

clipped from online.wsj.com

'Twas 147 Shopping Days Before Christmas ...

Rocked by Slump, Retailers Get Jump on Santa; 'Let's Get Past Halloween,' a Shopper Laments

It's the time of year when Dad's mowing the lawn, Mom's packing up a picnic, and the kids are splashing in the pool. Yep, it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas.

Toys "R" Us Inc. decided to market its summertime Christmas discounts with an image of Santa lounging on the beach in sunglasses. Sears.com and Kmart.com used a vintage, snowy street scene accompanied by offers of free shipping.

One person who is a little nonplused by the explosion in July Christmas sales is Mr. Barnes, the Texas songwriter with a band called Brave Combo who wrote "Christmas in July."

"I wrote it to say that when people are focused on making money, nothing is sacred," he says. "Of course, it was mainly intended to be amusing."

Bugs in new iPhone OS 3

2009-06-18T15:15:00.001-04:00

Landscape keyboard! Cut & paste! More new APIs than you can shake a developer at! Everybody's all hot and bothered over the iPhone OS 3.0 release - but what about the numerous bugs?.

clipped from www.woot.com

12 Bugs We've Found In iPhone OS 3.0

Multimedia messaging does not support sculpture, macrame, or interpretive dance.

Voice memo recordings totally don't sound like me. I don't sound like that, do I? Seriously?

Turned on adult content filter but everybody in my videos still has their clothes on.

Adding a task to calendar did not result in task getting done.

Clicked this blue "compass" icon but kept getting some stupid web browser.

Still no apps to cure the nagging feeling that I should've bought a Palm Pre.

The touchscreen is now on the back of the phone instead of the front.

Gone to the bathroom four times already today, and Remote Wipe hasn't worked once.

Spotlight search crashed with memory overload error trying to index my Harry Potter cosplay photo collection.

Tried out tethering, but I think I broke my finger smacking that phone around the pole.

Apple still hasn't fixed the no-hardware-keyboard bug.

"Cut" function does not apply to monthly AT&T bill.

Thought for the day: God is a woman

2009-05-17T15:21:00.001-04:00

I know I'm going to get myself into trouble by saying this out loud, but here goes:

Walking through the subway today, as I do almost every day, I was subjected to, as I am almost every day, the perhaps clichéd sidewalk preachers and signpost-wearers, warning of eminent doom, and that I must repent and follow God if I was to be saved eternal torment.

This one in particular, fairly new to this particular tube connecting the bus terminal with Times Square, wearing his "Fear God" hoodie and carrying his small, hand-lettered sign (but don't they all?), was again going on about the coming appocalypse (apparently the almighty has a timetable for withdrawal...). He says that Jesus is going to send all of us to eternal torment for not loving him. This got me thinking.

First, I never went to sunday school, but I'm pretty sure it's not Jesus who's going to be handing out the damnation red cards in the final days. (Please feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.) Everything I've read or heard about Jesus suggests he was a pretty forgiving and accomodating guy. If he can forgive the people publicly flogging him, I think he'd be willing to overlook the occasional lustful thought about my neighbor's wife.

It seems to me that the spirit of those sermons wasn't, "follow me explicitiy or I'll see to it you're tormented for eternity," so much as most of us are heading for a bad place, so grab your personal ethical floatation device so you don't end up there. Not, "follow me or I'll damn you," but "I'll help you if you do." A subtle difference, yes, but an important one.

Then I started to wonder who it was (deific or otherwise) that would choose to see you tortured for all eternity for not loving them completely? My mind went back to some relationships I've had.

And that's all I'm going to say about that.

The Swine Flu (When Pigs Fly)

2009-04-29T22:35:00.003-04:00

Now I'm ready to add my voice to the din. Now that I have a few minutes, that my wife has distracted the kid.

My chiropractor and I have the same opinion - our family is not going to get debilitated by swine flu. We disagree, however, on why.

See, I've based my opinion on science - empirical data and statistical history. He's based his on near-psychotic delusions.

I'm writing this having spent the day home with my kid, who's been hacking for the past 3 days and whose temperature has broken the point where his daycare would call us to take him home.

According to our "doctor," this means everything is as it should be.

He's not wrong in theory, he's wrong in practice.

What my son is exhibiting is a "normal" reaction to a foreign body. Most of us call this "sick." I do not consider this a "normal" state.

In our discussion this morning, he reitterated his lack of belief in "germ theory." (you can hear the quotes when he says it.) See, bacteria and viruses don't make people ill... sorry, "symptomatic." He feels you don't catch colds from viruses, because viruses are all around us - you come into contact with them all the time. (this is his assertion, and I'm sure there's some study somewhere, likely done by other chiropractors, that would validate this claim.) You get them, he says, when your imune system is compromised - when your spine is out of alignment.

When he reitterates, yet again, that a healthy imune system fights illness, I ask, isn't it better to not get infected in the first place?

I used the analogy of a trained fighter. You could be a 10th-degree blackbelt, and, if you ever found yourself in an altercation, it would likely save your life. I know just enough self defense tricks that it could possibly, maybe, save my life - if I were ever in need of it. I'm still standing today, not because of fighting skills, but because I don't get into those kinds of altercations.

This is when the "doctor" goes into psychotic denial mode.

"But you're going to get it anyway," he says. Except for the fact that I rarely (pre-kid, anyway) get sick. Arguably it's because I have a healthy imune system. I also wash my hands and don't suck on used kleenex.

"You're arguing that I'm OK because I have air bags, I'm saying I'd rather not get into an accident."

He mocked our teaching our son to cough into his elbow. This is a man who doesn't wash his hands after taking a dump in the office. He then procedes to touch people around the face and neck.

Make no mistake, the only reason my family goes to him is because my wife works for him. No one is twisting my arm to get me to go to a chiropractor - I will probably continue to go regularly, to someone else, after my wife finds her new job. I do find it beneficial. I also continue to take naproxen and ibuprofin for my tendonitis.

Tomorrow we're steam-cleaning my son's plush toys. Most of the victims of bubonic plague didn't believe in germ theory, either.

Why I like Woot

2009-04-17T10:45:00.001-04:00

yeah, cool stuff at great discounts is nice, but the fact that someone actually goes through the effort to write this stuff - daily - keeps my attention.

(Note: if you're unfamiliar with woot.com, if you visit the site after today, the deal mentioned below will have changed.)

clipped from www.woot.com

There’s only one gadget column on the web with the unique perspective that comes from being transported through time to discover that you can no longer control your bowels.

And here it is. That’s right, Fjafalgnjir the Vexed is back for another installment of Ask an Incontinent Viking. When this 11th-century Danish warrior found himself in a world he never made, did he cower from the iron dragons in the sky, or flee in terror from the “sorcery” of a standard light bulb? Well, for a day or two, yeah. And the whole incontinence thing wounded his warrior’s pride. But he got up, dusted himself off, wiped himself off, and found work answering your tech questions.

I love naught in life so well as my Mattel handheld football game, a wonder more thrilling even than the heaving teats of Gerðr. But it eats batteries the way vitterfolk devour goatling flesh.

Insert tab A into slot B

2009-03-25T21:52:00.006-04:00

Well, I guess it's time for what's getting to be my monthly posting about trips to Wisconsin - or as I like to call it, Chez Cheese. I know, I know, I haven't posted in two months. I actually wrote this one last month, but I never got around to finishing it. I didn't have anything to say about the month before because, frankly, it was uneventful (well, from a travel standpoint, anyway).

I did have the multiple gate-change, 4-hour layover fiasco in Chicago's O'Hare. (I was going to call the post, "O'Harried" or "O'Harrowing." Perhaps fortunately the post never happened.) While I was walking to my gate at one end of the terminal - the end of the terminal - they changed my gate to one in a completely different terminal. Let me say it again - changed while I was walking there. I lugged my 40 lb. shoulder bag (because who needs wheels?) and my backpack with laptop and accouterments (is that were luggage comes from, or is it the other way?) around the football stadium that is O'Hare for 4 hours. I had time to kill, and what was I supposed to do, buy a book and sit and read it?

They changed my gate 3 more times while I waited. Others told me that it was par for "No'Fare." So, while arduous, I didn't feel it particularly interesting enough to write about. Except that, well, I just did.

I knew what my topic was going to be last month, however, very soon after I landed. There is the unsung villain, perhaps villainous sidekick, rather, to air travel - car rental.

First off, there is the possibly illegal, though certainly unethical practice of tricking you into an upgrade. You reserve a small to midsize car, and when you show up to collect your reservation they say, "I have a monster SUV, or a fancy, high-end sport sedan available...?" Oh, they have plenty of smaller cars, too. But they're making you say, "OK" to the bigger car by presenting them, and only them, as options, usually without telling you they'll cost more.

Last month I switched to Avis from Enterprise, because I didn't like the later's practice of being a mere $10 cheaper, but offering a car so stripped down I was lucky to have automatic windows. (Does anyone have manual, roll-down windows anymore? But then what motion do you use when you want to talk to the person in the car next to you?) They (Enterprise) told me that for a "modest upgrade" I could get things like a stereo radio, cruise control (essential to keeping to the speed limit in a foreign state) and a key fob, so I don't have to fumble with gloves on in the snow and rain to get a key in and unlock one door then reach over and manually unlock the others to let in my passengers who're still standing outside. You know, the stuff we never had when we were kids. I know the corporate bean counters back home would balk at the word "upgrade" on my receipt, so I opted for the one who gave you all that stuff in the base rate.

If only they would give you the base rate. Booking the car through my corporate travel site, there's a price quoted for a midsize sedan of $48/day. Last month, when I got to the counter, the helpful woman at the counter said, "I have a Saturn Vue...?" Knowing as much about cars as I do economic foreign policy, I say, "m'OK," and am surprised to see a sporty little SUV waiting for me. And here I am thinking, wow, how nice of Avis to have such nice cars - worth the extra $10. There was some monster snow that weekend, so it turned out to be fortuitous.

So this time at the counter I'm told, "I have a [some brand I forget], which is a midsize SUV." Then, as I pause for a moment to consider what could be "midsize" for a monster truck that's far too huge for most people to get around in, and how it still qualifies as one, "it's $89 on your corporate rate." It's late at night and I'm tired, so my mental gears aren't completely greased.

"No," I say, "I certainly don't need anything that big," remembering the seats-6-with-all-their-luggage-and-a-kiddie-pool Vue.

"I have a Dodge Magnum...?"

"m'OK," I relent. She could have said, "I have Gursis Baba Friggle Bibby...?" and I would have said the same thing, because the only thing I could picture with the word "magnum" was condoms.

I'm not sure how I would classify the Dodge Magnum. It's got the look of a car for people who like to collect speeding tickets, but it's got a cargo area in the back. It's too short to be a van, but can you really call it a hatch-back? My van technically has a hatch on the back, but "hatch-back" brings other cars to mind. The Ford Pinto is a hatch-back. So is the AMC Gremlin. Back in my day, the name we used for cars that had a cargo area connected to the cab instead of a trunk was "Station Wagon." So, yeah, the Magnum is a fancy, sporty station wagon, albeit one in which you might actually be able to pick up a date.

Now the gears in my mind catch. Is this car, also $89 "on my corporate rate?" They didn't quote me a price, but is that what I paid last time? It's still bigger than I need, certainly not "blah," and I don't recall explicitly saying, "no, I want something cheaper." "No, not that big," should mean, to most people, "don't try to upsale me, just give me what I asked for."

This is decidedly dishonest for their use of the words, "on your corporate rate." They know I made the reservation trough a corporate travel agency. "Your corporate rate" is meant to imply that your company has agreed to the price. They haven't. That's the price Avis is offering to charge your company, and not necessarily discounted.

They handed me the barely discernible, used-up ink ribboned, dot matrix printout with, "initial here, here, here and here and sign here," but I didn't notice anything about a rate. It certainly wasn't told to me. I assumed, perhaps naively, that when my travel preferences explicitly state, "small to midsize" and quote a specific price when I make a reservation, that's what I'll get. No one at the airport asks me, "I have a first class seat available...?" when I get my boarding pass.

Yes, yes, caveat emptor, and I should check what I'm paying before I sign, but I already agreed to one price, so unless someone specifically says, "this is more," then that's all I should pay. They did say (this time) a particular car was more, but to that option I said, no. Without being told, upfront, before I say, OK, what the price of the other option is, I have to assume it's what I agreed to.

Not that I'm paying for it. I'm expensing the car. I just don't want the people whose corporate pockets the cost is coming out of coming by my office, jabbing their finger at my credit card statement, going, "explain this!" I'm sure I can manage a good, "b'wah...?" and reiterate the above. They've been letting me slide on my two beers with dinner (expensing alcohol is verboten) so I'm hoping they'll let this go, too.

Now we come to the little exercise I like to call, "Insert tab A into slot B." When was the last time you got into a car that came with instructions? OK, technically they all come with instructions, but when have you ever felt it necessary to read them? These are the keys that were in the car (broken ring hole, tape and all):

First, why do car rental agencies feel it necessary to give you two keys, then insist on bolting them together? What am I supposed to do with the second key? Use it when some distempered valet snaps the other one off in the lock?

Turns out, I don't know what to do with either key. They slide into the ignition, but that appears to be all they do. They slide so far into the ignition, with the head of the key so small, that I can just barely get my fingers in there to try to turn them. I don't try to twist too hard for fear of snapping them off or lacerating my fingers on the edges.

To that point, I've seen keys like this before - small, hideaway ones that slide into the remote fob. I've assumed they were there in case the remote battery died, so you could still open the door. These slide into the ignition, but so far that you can't turn them, so now I'm looking all over the interior for a start button, something other than the familiar turning key that's so much a given they're on my son's baby toys.

I shine a light into the ignition socket, and then I take another look at the key fob. That's when I remember that the point of most technological "innovation" is to be capricious and unnecessary. (Technology for its own sake, adding complication to simplicity because it's kewl.) And it dawns on me - the plug-shaped fob is the key. I jam it into the socket and twist and voilá, it starts up.

If two keys is mockingly unnecessary, then two keys that don't work, bolted onto something that doesn't look like a key but is, is just fucking with me.

For this I paid extra.

Quiznos can suck my ass

2009-03-25T15:46:00.001-04:00

"Mmmm, mmmm, mmmm, mmmm, zzzzzzz....."

Right through the security screening at Chicago O'Hare (which I got through with one of those dangerous, deadly bottles of water in my bag - forgot it was there, but noticed my bags on the x-ray screen as the screener's back was turned to it to talk to the "security" person behind him - your tax dullards at work, don't you feel safe now?) is tiny Quiznos sub stand.

Long story short: the timestamp on my reciept is 1:19PM, my order number is 86. I realize how much of an error I've made when, waiting in a crowd of other people still waiting for their sandwiches, they're still calling numbers in the 70's.

There's three people working behind the counter - one person ringing up sales as fast as people queue up on line, one person making sandwiches as fast as she cares to make them, and another handing them out as fast as they roll out of the oven (i.e. not very).

Some 15 minutes later, and they're calling numbers in the low 80's, and I think I might actually get to eat something before my flight. "84!" Soon, very soon. "85!" OK, any minute now.

Except now there's a shift change for the person pulling the subs out of the oven. She leaves, and is out of sight before her replacement waddles (and I do mean waddles) into view. The replacement doesn't look like she's in a hurry to breathe (and appears to be using most of her mental capacity to remain doing so). There's an empty wire rack from the last sub at the end of the oven conveyor, and it's keeping the current sub from leaving the oven completely. So while the relief wrapper is punching in and slowly (I don't think she bent her knees once) squeezing her oompa-loompa frame between the sandwich maker and the oven, I'm watching what I assume to be my sandwich (read on) approach cumbustion.

"87!"

"What about 86!" I bark, and am sumarily ignored.

It's now more than 20 minutes past the time on my receipt. "90!" (they failed to call 88 or 89 as well) 20 minutes - this is lousy service on the season opener of Hell's Kitchen. How long should I be expected to wait for a god-damned sandwich? They only have 4 or 5 kinds on the menu, so it's not like I confused anyone with something unusual. It's not like they do anything else.

I decided I wasn't going to stand for such [dis]service and went back to the cashier and waited on line again to demand a refund. Of course there's a form that had to be filled out. I'm asked to sign at the bottom, then, "sorry about that." On the bottom it's noted, "customer said they waited too long," as the reason. (The man behind me asked, "what's good here?" I told him another place down the terminal. When he laughed, I related the above and he heeded my advice.) She handed me back my original receipt, and that was it. I paid with a credit card, so there wasn't anything necessarily to physically give me, but there was no button pushing on the register, either. We'll see if it shows up on my statement in a week.

[Disclaimer: I do realize that the quality of service (or lack thereof) of this particular, possibly franchised, establishment may not be indicative of the level of service of the entire chain. I can recall eating at at least two other Quiznos before, and getting my food in a timely enough manner. I've also worked for a number of years in the retail food business, so please don't try to tell me I should have been more respectful of the people who're only taking whatever jobs are available to them and/or that perhaps I don't understand the strains of the job.]

Spare Change

2009-02-25T15:50:00.001-05:00

Thought this was funny. Visit the site, buy a shirt (or don't).

clipped from www.mikero.com

if only we were running out of crazy people...

2009-02-24T12:29:00.001-05:00

more of the same, this time with audio goodness

clipped from www.huffingtonpost.com

Michele Bachmann: "We're Running Out Of Rich People In This Country"

* ACORN is "under federal indictment for voter fraud," but the stimulus bill nevertheless gives ACORN "$5 billion." (In reality, ACORN is not under federal indictment and isn't mentioned in the stimulus bill at all.)

* the stimulus bill includes a measure to create a "rationing board" for health care, and after the bill becomes law, "your doctor will no longer be able to make your healthcare decisions with you."

* the recovery package is part of a Democratic conspiracy to "direct" funding away from Republican districts, so Democratic districts can "suck up" all federal funds. Bachmann doesn't think this will work because, as she put it, "We're running out of rich people in this country."

"Running out of rich people?"

2009-02-24T11:51:00.001-05:00

It might be technically correct, as fewer and fewer collect and hoard more and more of the money, but is the biggest economic problem in this country really hurting the richest of us in a way comparable to how it's hurt everyone else?

clipped from dccc.org

Republican Congresswoman Michele Bachmann, a national GOP figure, actually said that one of her excuses for 'just saying no' to President Obama's economic recovery bill was because "We're running out of rich people in this country."

the pig likes it

2009-01-27T14:11:00.000-05:00

There was one rule I used to espouse to others when entering into a flame war. "Do Not Feed the Bears." It just keeps them coming back, doesn't it? There's a reason they tell you not to feed the animals when going through the drive-through safari. You may have seen the videos of the hoards of baboons scrambling to get into someone's car after they made the mistake of rolling down their window to offer a peanut.

On the one hand, I should be grateful someone is reading what I write. But what to do when your new "fan" is someone whose time is occupied with "BLLARRGGHHH!!! DEMOCRATSARETHEWORSTEVAR!! OBAMA'S THE MOST FAILED PRESIDENT OF ALL TIMES!!!! HE'SCORRUPTANDEVILWE'REALLDOOOOMMED!!!!!"? So what if they're the only person to date who's ever thought enough about my blog to leave a comment?

It's like, "I really like what you say, it strikes a cord with me. By the way, I molest children."

Perhaps that's an extreme analogy, but when you're dealing with someone form whom the Biggest Threat to OWL (Our Way of Life) is gays marrying, well, there's not much reason you can interject into the discussion.

There's a part of me, a part that I'm finding difficult to let go of, that still believes there's something, some phrasing, some analogy, some way of illustrating the situation, some fact, that's just waiting to be said out loud, because the other party just hasn't heard it or considered it, and suddenly the lights will go on - there will be that "aha!" moment and all will be clear. I've been trying to do that with my mother for more than 40 years, and it hasn't worked yet. Sometimes the reason train runs express and doesn't stop at every station.

My first inclination, of course, is to wade into the fracas with, "but you realize Bush..." but that would immediately equate me with these very same people who responded to any criticism of George II with, "b-b-b-but Clinton..."

It doesn't matter how faulty their logic, you cannot win an "I'm rubber, you're glue" argument.

There really is no argument to win - and that's the issue. I had classes in how to argue in college. (Well, to argue anywhere, not just in college.) It was actually called Critical Reasoning and Argument. An "argument" makes a Claim, supported by Grounds and established with a Warrant. See, "reasoning" was the key. An argument was only valid when no one could refute your grounds or find fault in your warrant. We spent more than half the class covering fallacies - the ad hominem argument, the "appeal to authority," the straw man, etc. (there are scores of them) - or faulty reasoning. (or not reasoning at all.) Like all logical tests, you just have to find one instance - no matter how far-fetched - where it doesn't work to invalidate it. The grounds, or "facts," were often left to interpretation.

See, Logic doesn't tolerate hypocrisies. If it's right, it's right, if it's wrong, it's wrong. I have very little compassion for the hate-filled hearts that are white supremacists (OK, none). But I do feel poor little Adolph Hitler and Aryan Nation should be returned to their parents. It doesn't matter than some would like to see the parents beaten with pipes, the state, so far, hasn't provided adequate grounds for removing them.

Likewise, President Obama has taken an oath of the office - he's sworn to uphold, defend and protect the Constitution. It doesn't matter the exact wording used. It doesn't matter what kind of bible his hand was on, if it was on one at all, or which hand was raised. For 8 years we were told, "he was elected, he's president, suck it up, deal with it." Yet now it seems open to discussion.

There's another aphorism that goes, "you're the one who ends up stinking if you get into a fight with a skunk." The point of dictionary definition argument is to resolve conflict - to present ideas to come to agreement. There is nothing to be gained from endlessly hurling "you suck!" "no, you suck!" at each other. Put another way, what do you get when you get into an argument with an idiot? Two idiots. You'd be better arguing with the cat you just ran over that it shouldn't be dead, or with the rain that it shouldn't be falling out if the sky.

There are some, unfortunately, who revel in the slugfest. They'll hurl barbs and insults, the more outrageous and unfounded the better, for the whole point of getting you to enter into the pissing contest - but only to point out to their compatriots how "unreasonable" you're being. And that's the point of all this. Never wrestle with a pig. You both get dirty, but the pig likes it.

(I ended up replying to the thread anyway. They set the bait and I took it. I'm weak that way.)

it's a matter of timing, isn't it?

2009-01-26T14:58:00.001-05:00

Hits the nail on the head. You cannot legislate behavior. (e.g Prohibition) Few refrain from killing simply because it's illegal to do so.

clipped from raphael.doxos.com

Pro Life Day

the issue is not Pro-Abortion Laws, it is the culture that creates the need for abortion.

This is not the laws: that should be the very last issue we face. Our first step is not to make something illegal for which the wealthy will travel across boarders (look at Ireland’s experience) and the poor will make do with what they can.

Our first step is the hearts of the American people.

It's not a ripple, it's a wake

2009-01-23T14:59:00.000-05:00

[what follows is a reposting from the FOLIO: MedioPRO
social networking site: http://mediapro.foliomag.com/profiles/blog/list]

That was the tag line in my response to someone's question here. The question was about whether or not the current (euphemistically named) "economic downturn" was affecting our industry.

My first response was, "you don't work in this business, do you?"

In the news today was notice that McCann Erickson was laying off 3% of the company, and Playboy was essentially closing its NY production offices (“'a small number' of licensing, editorial and other publishing positions" would relocate to Chicago - the positions, mind you, not necessarily the people who currently hold them).

That was just this morning. That was just New York City.

My magazine folded and I was laid off a week before my wedding. It was, at the time, one of the better things to happen to me.* It was less than three and a half years ago.

*(Getting laid off, I mean, not the wedding. Not that getting married wasn't great - it was - it was better. Please don't show this to my wife.)

I would have been closing an issue right up until the big day. They were doing me a favor. In addition to offering me (as I remember) 3 months' severance, they gave me the option of the job I currently hold. There were a slew of freelance opportunities to be had. My choices were steady income for a little while, and the opportunity to make money on top of that, or back at work on Monday. No one faulted me for choosing the former.

It afforded me the opportunity to work at a few other, big name titles, to meet and get to know more people in the business, to see how everyone else does things. What did it teach me? 1) that I really do know what I'm doing (though I remain terribly insecure); 2) there are many people I still need to learn a lot from; and 3) this business is really small - everyone knows everyone else.

Of the people I know that do what I do, many of them are happy to be getting a regular paycheck - the ones that are getting one. People I used to freelance for are now freelancing themselves, some less than they'd like. A temp agency I once dealt with years ago at my last job (I hired one person for a few weeks who wasn't terribly talented) is now calling me monthly, in the vain hope that someone may have fallen under a bus (perish the thought!) and I might have an open position. The job posting boards that were all Production, Production and Production, long enough after I accepted my current job to make me wonder if I'd made the right choice, now only list the occasional Photo Researcher. (I had a kid on the way, and a regular check and health insurance seemed a good idea.)

Our printer laid off more than 500 people while I was at one of their plants two weeks ago. There were whole football field-sized rooms of presses not running. It is no longer a matter of performance, but of cost cutting. That's why many people like me are scared. No one wants to be rendered redundant.

Not just redundant, but irrelevant.

While freelancing, I turned my nose up at jobs that needed an "expert" with Quark 4 on Mac OS 9 - both of which I am, but who wants more experience with those skills on a résumé? Now I'm in a similar position, but on the other side of the fence. See, we just got the Adobe CS2 suite last year. Yes, CS2. And yes, CS4 is entering into the work stream now. Every tip, trick and how-to site I frequent is now rife with gushing reports on the new CS4 features, though they're still full of their mainstay CS3 solutions. Solutions, many of which, I can't use, because I don't use that version every waking minute. Once the go-to guy, the guru, the expert, now I'm the one with the disadvantaged skill set.

(I'm not even going to mention all of the software I'm getting to make my job easier that doesn't work on my OS X 10.3 system. Nope, not going to mention it at all.)

While my particular title is doing well, the company just laid off 100 people just before the holidays. As much as I've convinced everyone there's tremendous benefits to upgrading that go beyond bolstering my skill set, they've stated they have no current plans to do so.

Of course, all of this assumes we're printing anything on paper in the next 10 years. They're already talking about the "Death of the Newspaper" like they were talking about Obama being president back in October.

I'm not adverse to change. I went to school for film, got a degree in English, got a job in video post production, which turned into web production, which turned into rebuilding servers, which, naturally, lead to a job doing page layout. The universe has always pointed the way for me in the past to get me to where I am now (not too shabby, so far) so I guess I'm looking for the sign post that's going to tell me what new skills to pick up and which to drop. It's not that I don't want to move, just that all my stuff is here, and I know I can't take all of it with me (especially as I'll likely be moving to a cheaper place).

So, tell me, what's the next big thing? Better minds than mine are still climbing all over themselves trying to figure that out.

I've thought about teaching. You know, if you can't beat 'em, train 'em. I really do enjoy sharing what I know (sometimes even with people who don't care to know it). One thing there's still no shortage of is schools churning out scores of youngsters ready to apply for my job - people with no kids or mortgages who can move on to the next industry the way I used to move on to the next bar.

My dad used to have a bumper sticker that read, "Old age and treachery will overcome youth and skill." Maybe it's time I start playing dirty.

so long, and sorry about all the fish...

2009-01-21T18:20:00.001-05:00

some of the images are pretty remarkable

clipped from www.boston.com

as for what's in the folder:
When they forced Khruschev out, he sat down and wrote two letters to his successor. He said - "When you get yourself into a situation you can't get out of, open the first letter, and you'll be safe. When you get yourself into another situation you can't get out of, open the second letter". Soon enough, he gets into a tight situation, and he opens the first letter. It says - "Blame it all on me". So he blames it all on the old guy, and it worked like a charm. When he got himself into a second situation, he opened the second letter. It said - "Sit down, and write two letters".

Funny condom ad

2009-01-15T15:05:00.001-05:00

NSFW(OBA) not safe for work (or balloon animals)

the "outtakes" are pretty funny, too

clipped from www.boingboing.net

Star Wars retold by someone who hasn't seen it.

2009-01-15T13:16:00.001-05:00

via BoingBoing

clipped from vimeo.com

Star Wars: Retold (by someone who hasn't seen it)

The Fed helps those who help themselves (to your money)

2009-01-15T12:12:00.000-05:00

Why can we so readily approve giving away public funds (at a deficit, with no tax base to recover them) to banks and brokerage firms, but we have a hard time allocating money for regular Americans with genuine need?

I don't wish to debate the wisdom of helping the most wealthy out of a situation their own greed created, because they're "too big to fail." I believe business runs on access to available credit, and credit markets need to be relieved.

But if we all agree that the economy thrives when money changes hands, does it make better sense to bail out a corporation so they can cut their losses, bolster their profit, so stockholders have value in their holdings (emphasis on "holding"), or to give the money to people who will actually spend it?

I don't mean the stereotypically irresponsible things like flatscreens and Nintendo Wii's (I believe the huge corporate retail chains like Walmart will endure). But if instead of giving insurer AIG some $80 billion to keep them afloat, we floated some of those funds to people who've been most impacted by the economy, they could afford things - things like health insurance - and give companies that provide goods and services their much needed capital.

Now I'm going to speculate. (You may want to get your tinfoil hat.) Why can't we do this? You're still going to buy that flatscreen and latest-model iPod, aren't you? (if you're a good American, and do what you're told, you're going to go out and shop to help the economy.) But without available cash, you're going to buy them on credit. And for that, the banks make money, in the form of interest.

On the other hand, it's been shown that many people, with large consumer debt, given the funds would choose to lower their debit position. (e.g. pay off some of their credit cards.) This is good for consumers - it lowers their unsecured debt, lowers their interest payments, and gives them more funds to save, if only for that new iPod.

It is, however, bad news for a bank. It lowers their interest income and reduces their assets. Yes, the money you owe them is an asset. It is only "unsecured" to you, in that you don't have an asset (e.g. a house) to offset the debt. Recent changes in bankruptcy laws mean the bank will get its money, somehow. There is no risk that the poor, defenseless bank, who was only trying to help everyone it could by extending them all ridiculous amounts of credit, even to those evil cheats who lied about the stability of their employment, would get left twisting in the wind.

And if you don't get your own, personal infusion of bailout cash - if you can no longer pay your bills - even better for the bank. They now get to charge usury... I mean, the default interest rate, meaning it's going to cost you more money to not have any.

(You can take your hat off now. If the above made sense, then it was working.)

[the following text is stolen from TrueMajority.org]
The U.S. faces the most serious economic crisis since the Great Depression. Just how deep we go and how long the recession lasts depends upon how quickly we take steps to counter it.

The economy is hemorrhaging jobs at a frightful rate. For all of 2008, the economy lost a net total of 2.6 million jobs. That was the most since 1945, when nearly 2.8 million jobs were lost.
More than 300 of the country’s leading economists have called for immediate passage of a significant and broad-based jobs and economic recovery package.

A package must include investments in alternative energy technology to create millions of new jobs and generate billions in public revenue and tackle the issue of climate change and reduce our dependence on foreign oil.

We must also provide grants to state and local governments so that they will not be forced to raise taxes, layoff workers and cut services in the middle of a downturn.

Finally, we need investments in public infrastructure that will provide a crucial shot in the arm for the economy and create hundreds of thousands of good paying jobs to strengthen our middle class.

Lonely teen? Kill yourself - it's your only option, and it's funny, says Pepsi

2008-12-04T12:24:00.001-05:00

For everyone horrified by the new Pepsi ads, everyone who's had a personal experience with suicide and is sickened by it, there's some yahoo saying, "it's just an ad, relax, it's funny."

Personally, I'm not so distraught by the idea, let alone graphical representation, of a cartoon blob killing itself, than I am by the belief that it's a fait accompli that's what you do when you're lonely. Not a smart message for the product's target demographic.

clipped from adage.com

Pepsi Opens a Vein of Controversy With New Suicide-Themed Ads

From the comments:

People keep commenting how beautiful the Pepsi ad illustrations are, as if that mitigates the offense. It's like saying, "she killed her boyfriend, but she's gorgeous".

http://www.cloudoutloud.tv/2008/12/pepsi-suicide-ad-is-boring-in-a-disturbing-way/
– Michelle McCormack | Boston, MA

Air Fair 3: Return to the Ticket Counter

2008-11-25T12:22:00.000-05:00

How was flying again? In a word: AAAAUUUUGGGGHHHH!!!!!

That's not a word? How about this word: motherfucker.

Technically two words, but Merriam Webster says it's one, defining it as a "generalized term of abuse."

To give you an idea, I started writing this before most of it happened. The more I typed, it seemed the worse it got.

Due to time constraints, I can't be so free with the airline or price this time. There's not a whole lot that doesn't leave too early the day before (the latest was at 7, I was working until 10) or arrive too late in the day the next day. A lot of those not only left obscenely early - 6-7 am - but had up to 4(!) hour layovers. (Flying due east to Wisconsin? You won't mind a 3-hour stop in Georgia - because it's on the way. You can walk around outside, in your winter coat.)

Have you ever flown before? On a plane? Ever watch with irritated bemusement when they start boarding, calling first class and people with special needs (same thing, I know), and some twitchy fuckers with refrigerator dollies for luggage crowd around the gate, like it's the Wyoming land rush and someone's suddenly going to yell, "go!" and they can race for the best seat - a seat which was assigned before they go there. They crowd right up to the rope, with postures that scream, "me? me now? now? me?" because they might call the rows in alphabetical instead of numerical order.

This may actually be the case now. See, I figured I'd be smart this time (ha!) and not opt for the middle seat near the front, nor over the wing, next to the engine. No, I grabbed the completely empty (at the time) row at the back of the plane (a little ways from the lavatory, of course). I should be in the first group to board. I print out my boarding passes, which have a big number "4" on them.

Apparently United - whom I've now flown for the last time (or at least attempted to, read on) - shuffles everybody around, and boards by these numbers which, as far as I could tell, don't correspond to anything. People who boarded with the 1's were sitting near me, and some other 4's were sitting near the front. If it works for them, so be it. Just bolloxes up my cunning plan.

I can still hear George Carlin voicing over my son's Thomas the Tank Engine DVD's: "Then, there was trouble."

Seems there's a hydraulic problem with one of the wings. (Don't hydraulics have to do with water? If we're flying in the air, why is this a problem?) By 6:30 (6 am departure, been there since 5, up since 3:30) I'm waiting in the (now) long line at the gate, trying to get rebooked so I can make it to Chez Cheese before my press runs, if not my connecting flight.

Verizon is connecting me to United customer (dis)service - or so they say, before hanging up on me. I manage to get through, and button mash my way to an agent. Let's just say that my company's java-laiden flight booker in my old browser on my older system works faster than this guy. Turns out there's not so many flights - at least on United

He tells me the next flight out doesn't leave until 8:30. The next connecting flight gets me in at 2:30 - which, accounting for time zones is really 3:30. There were other flights, direct or connecting through other cities that would have gotten me there earlier, but they all leave around 6, so they're gone now. How terribly efficient.

When I tell him to book me a flight on another airline, he tells me, "that's not possible." Never mind that I can hear the gate agent booking people on Continental.

The pilot had said he didn't expect the issue to be solved for at least another 45 minutes at the earliest, and that it didn't look good. Chucklehead on the phone says, "it looks here like your flight is scheduled to depart at 7:15 (riiiight), so perhaps that's your best bet." I wouldn't make my scheduled connection, but I'm booked on the flight after, which is still early enough.

Are there still seats available on the 8:30? Oh, yes, he says, plenty of seats. "Plenty" of seats? Or "a lot" of seats? "I'm showing a lot of seats still open." I figure I can rebook if I have to if the plane isn't fixed presently.

...which, of course, is as soon as I get off the phone. Everyone get your stuff, we're deplaning now. (and now I have Hervé Villechaize in my head again.)

Oh, and that 8:30? Now sold out.

Don't feel sorry for me. There were a lot of kids on this plane. The mere ordeal of flying was already causing some of them to melt down. This kind of stuff is torture to them. One child, who couldn't have been more than a few weeks old, was managing to sleep through it all. Pity her parents, who have to lug around all the stuff that comes with traveling with children. If you think it's hard to go through this, go through this with children who're going through it, too.

One thing did manage to brighten my morning. A cute little tyke, jumping up and down and squealing a happy squeal in the carrier her mom wore over her chest. I smiled. I caught her mother's eye and said, "I love kids."

Surprised, she said, "you do?"

"Yes," I said, "they're delicious."

Waiting in line again, I get on the phone with my corporate travel office - which is only open during business hours (it's 7 am on Saturday). Still, I get through to someone. They rebook me on a Midwest flight (official airline of the Milwaukee Brewers, thank you very much, and that cookie they serve during the flight - mmm...), leaving around 11:30, but still getting in just under the wire. I'm told to have the United gate agent print me a ticket. The agent, after waving his hands that he didn't rebook it so he can't verify that I have a seat, blah, blah, he prints out what looks like a ticket and a receipt. He then tears up my original boarding passes, so now this is the only proof I have that I've paid for any flight at all.

It was not a boarding pass, which I thought, but which the TSA agent kindly informed me. I need to check in at the ticket counter. (This is why I check in online and print my boarding passes.)

Only there's no one at the ticket counter. First, the Midwest counter is at the complete, opposite end of the terminal - the very last one, in fact. And it's closed. (Why would it be open? They don't have any planes leaving for hours yet.) And while even AirTran has dozens of self-serv kiosks, Midwest has one, sad, unattended counter. So I get to start writing this post, for an hour, before it's staffed again.

"Then, there was trouble."

Turns out the paper I have isn't a boarding pass, nor is it a ticket. It's got a whole bunch of numbers and codes on it that say, "he was ours, he's your problem now." The agent tells me I need a ticket to check in. So she sends me over to the United counter - at the other end of the terminal - to get a ticket.

This counter is staffed - though the staff insist I can use the self-serv kiosk. I'm belligerent enough that they take a look at my stuff, and they can't understand why the gate agent didn't print the ticket out. Here you go, no problem.

Back to the Midwest counter.

"Then, there was trouble."

The agent says she can't give me a boarding pass, because she needs to attach it to a ticket. Now, I just handed her what looked and felt like an airline ticket, and it was stapled to my other paperwork, so I'm befuddled.

See, there's a ticket number, but at the top it says, "e-ticket." Apparently this means it ceases to be made of paper. And, being electronic, you can't actually staple a boarding pass... to the paper... with "e-ticket" written on it.

I consider suggesting writing "put me on a friggin' plane, you dolt" across the top, but deign to listen to her tell me it's the system that won't allow her to do it.

So she sends me back to the United counter.

At the other end of the terminal.

Still carrying my bags.

The United staff share my "are you a freakin' idiot?" moment and write me a "do this" note to take back.

Now I can has barding pasz. One with "SSSS" written all over it. It apparently stands for "Super Secret Special Screening." Because, before, when I booked my flight myself, I was OK. But now that they've canceled my flight and I've been standing around the airport for hours, now I'm a security risk. I've been through security once already, and I haven't left the airport, but now I might be carrying a bomb.

Which, come to think of it, doesn't seem that far fetched. Though I'd be more inclined to bomb the useless plane I kicked off than the one that might actually take me where I'm going. I just hope they don't put the toddlers through this.

(I should note that the very polite gentleman who checked all my stuff, explaining that it's common to be "selected" in cases of canceled flights, who was using his high tech gadgets to detect microscopic traces of explosive components on my laptop, was a bit awestruck at the discovery of my Bluetooth headset. He hadn't seen anything like it before. Way to keep up with technology.)

It's OK. I've got nothing on me that would warrant a FBCS (figure it out). And I've got hours before my plane leaves. Take your time. I should be able to get to the press just in time.

(I'll point out that I got to the press, went to my hotel, finished writing most of this, watched a movie, went to bed... and then went to approve the color on press, 11 hours later. Again, don't feel bad for me. I keep thinking about my 2-yr-old son, who woke up looking for daddy. When he told me on the phone, "I want to go to the airport, too," he still could have.)

The Midwest ticket agent asked me if I would be willing to accept sitting in an exit row ("sorry, that's all I have available") - oh, hell yeah. "Willing to accept" extra legroom? Are you kidding?

Except when you're sitting next to someone who's booked the exit row because they need the extra room. The shoulders of the linebacker sitting next to me extended into my headrest. I spent the trip leaning out into the aisle.

Still, I managed to sleep. Except for when I kept getting hit by the drink trolly.

That cookie was pretty good.

Hammer time: US citizen security threatened by insecure "secure" passports

2008-10-31T11:24:00.001-04:00

I am so taking a hammer to mine... when I eventually get around to renewing it.

clipped from www.boingboing.net

New US RFID passports manufactured offshore at a huge profit, transported by unsecured couriers

After the computer chips are inserted into the back cover of the passports in Europe, the blank covers are shipped to a factory in Ayutthaya, Thailand, north of Bangkok, to be fitted with a wire Radio Frequency Identification, or RFID, antenna. The blank passports eventually are transported to Washington for final binding, according to the documents and interviews.

Outsourced passports netting govt. profits, risking national security
(via Beyond the Beyond)

Commies are Pink, Herrings are Red; Republicans stink, you heard what I said

2008-10-29T16:04:00.000-04:00

"Patriotism is supporting your country all of the time, and your government when it deserves it." - Samuel Clemens

Last week, Gov. Sarah Palin and Rep. Michele Bachmann accused progressives of not being "real Americans."

This week, conservatives have decided to brand progressives as "Communists," "Socialists," "Marxists" and "Redistributors" for supporting tax policies that help middle-class families.

We’ve had enough.

http://www.iamproamerica.com

We believe that in difficult times, it's been Progressive leadership that has put our country back on track.

We believe that we can rebuild our economy in a way that helps every American - not just the richest.

We believe that health care is a right, not a privilege.

We believe that we can build an education system that truly leaves no child behind.

We believe in the American Dream.

I am Pro-America. I am Progressive.

http://www.iamproamerica.com

EULA-sive signal: there's no such thing as a free wi-fi

2008-10-24T15:52:00.000-04:00

Like every other person with a laptop, I'm trying to get some work done while I wait for my plane. (real work, not this blog.) That work requires internet access. Like every other traveler who travels infrequently enough to not warrant a wireless broadband card, I'm lamenting having to pay through the nose for the same wi-fi access I can get free with a cup of coffee, or by merely sitting in the park.

The service is provided by Boingo. My choices are $5 for one hour, or $8 for 24 hours. The later would seem a bargain, if you expect to be waiting a while or, like me, will have a layover in Detroit for an hour and a half (see below). But wait! For $9.95* you can get service for a whole month! (* for 3 months, after which it's $22/month.)

These are called "teaser rates" (yes, like the one on your mortgage) or a form of low-balling. Low-balling is a sales technique where they get you to agree to a low price, so you start to consider the item yours already, then they raise the price, sometimes incrementally, a little at a time. Emotionally you want the item, and you (in your mind) have already made it yours, so a couple bucks more isn't going to dissuade you from your purchase - you're a fish on a hook now, and you're not going to walk away.

This is a typical car dealer tactic - they "cut" the sticker price, for you, 'cus you're nice, and they really want to sell it, and you really want to buy it, right? As you sit down to sign the paperwork, the sales person steps out to ~~have a cigarette~~ "talk to his boss," who unfortunately tells him he "can't sell it at that price," but "let's see what we can do." Then back out ~~for some coffee~~ to haggle with the boss, on your behalf, and they "come to a compromise" on the price - which is a lot more than you agreed to pay.

Then they start tacking on the "extras," or stuff you thought came with the car because, you know, it's on the one you looked at. ("Oh, no, that one sells for the sticker price. The price you agreed to is for a different car - one without a radio.")

Teasers are not like Leaders, which are sometimes ridiculously low prices, just to get you interested in buying something enough to get you into the store. Because if Leaders are like the price for regular gas (87 octane), then Teasers are Super (89), as compared to Premium (91), or the price of a medium soda at the theater (there is no small, so what's it in the middle of?) compared to the large. The difference in price is nominal, so since you've mentally agreed to the price point, why not get the much better/bigger item? Why buy 16 oz. of crap your body doesn't want or need (for half the price of the ticket), when "for just .35¢ more" you can have 32 oz? You're going to get your money's worth, dammit. (and do the peepee dance all through the third act of the film, because you have a 28 oz. bladder.)

I'm in an airport at most 2 times, every other month - usually much less. (And I usually plan it so I'm waiting less than an hour.) If I wanted unlimited wireless internet access for, say, my phone, it wouldn't cost me $22/month. This is for the desperate, not those with legitimate need.

But as it's only $10/month for the first 3, perhaps I can just sign up, then cancel. Canceling should be easy, right?

From the End User License Agreement:

Can I cancel my subscription?

1. Once your order is finalised, you cannot cancel it before the end of the subscription period you have requested, unless our service is not in accordance with this Agreement and that entitles you under normal legal rules to terminate your order.
2. You can prevent your subscription automatically renewing for a further period by notifying us before your present subscription ends in accordance with clause 15.1. [emphasis mine]

So, you have to request a cancellation before the subscription ends, but you're not actually allowed to cancel it at that time. This, I suspect, is what ropes people into fraudulently-named "free" credit reports and Girls Gone Wild videos. See, you have to make the request in writing. Their address is prominently displayed - at the bottom of the EULA, which you can see while you're inside any airport they service.

(My plane boarded rather soon after, so all ended up doing was starting to write this post.)

On to the layover in Detroit. After deplaning (and I always hear Hervé Villachaize saying that), I find out my connecting flight is the same friggin' plane I was just on. Though my stuff is safer with me than alone with the cleaning crew, I'm lugging it around the terminal now. One moving walkway away, I notice the Online Cafe, with people with laptops and little terminals at some of the booths. Perfect - I really do need to touch base with the office.

Ordering [second] breakfast, I'm now a paying customer of the Online Cafe. "I can has free wi-fi nau?" "No, not yours." It's $5 for 15 minutes (because who sits and eats longer than that?), but for only a few dollars more you get it for longer than you plan on being there. Fabulous. I'm expensing it, anyway.

(And I really did appreciate the waitress, very discreetly at the top of her lungs, announcing my login and password to the rest of the terminal. I'm the only one authorized to use it, so it's safe.)

Air Fair 2: Dyspeptic Bugaboo - TSA rules hard to swallow

2008-10-24T14:05:00.000-04:00

I'm a fan of BoingBoing.net. They have several ongoing threads regarding the current state of the Security Theater™ under the oppression of which we now live. Among the heart-rending stories of children being forcibly removed from planes and grandmothers being accused of paedophilia for taking pictures of empty playgrounds, are numerous stories about the malfeasance that is the TSA. One of the more recent is the TSA employee who managed to walk out of Newark "Liberty" (ha!) International with a couple hundred thousand dollars of high-end electronics (cameras, laptops, GPS's) from passengers' bags over the course of (at least) several months, with not even the TSA noticing.

So, I'm flying out of Newark this trip. Didn't have any issues this time (unlike others, see below). I even went through with the Swiss Army nail clipper that I had meant to take out of my bag. (it doesn't have a knife, but the nail file is rather pointy. and then there's that miniature screw driver...) After reading all the stories of people having things like nail clippers confiscated, I was surprised to find it there later. Either they're allowing people to trim their nails on planes now, or they just didn't notice. Past experience would suggest the later, but since they did find the two 1 oz. bottles of shampoo and conditioner I saved from the hotel's refuse on the return trip, I have to assume they saw it and let it go.

Do you know what else they're apparently allowing on planes now? Knitting needles.

Knitting fucking needles.

Yeah, I know, you can't really see them in the shot, but trust me, that old lady was pearling two while I was trying to surreptitiously snap a pic with my phone. I was wary of being frog marched off the plane for the "suspicious act" of taking a picture. Because only terrorists use cameras and only little old ladies use 8-inch metal spikes. On planes.

They're apparently also exempt from the "please put all carry-on items under the seat in front of you" rule. You put the loose stuff that's not tied down under the seat so that it doesn't fly across the plane in an accident. The damage you'd take from the "rapid deceleration trauma" of the plane suddenly meeting concrete isn't made any better by metal spikes suddenly meeting the back of your head.

(I probably would have let it go in this case, too, as where she was sitting they would likely only fly through first class.)

Bruce Schneier [Schneier.com] is my hero. I've read many articles and blog posts written by him in the realm of computer security. His expertise is not limited to mere computers but encompasses Security in general. He should be granted sainthood. He contributed to an Atlantic Monthly article recently ["The Things He Carried"] which showed just how easily airport security [theater] can be circumvented. If you think a bunch of near minimum wage, marginally educated, authority abusing, blue-shirted baggage [mis]handlers are keeping you safer, you need to read this article.

And if you think it the height of irresponsibility to show just how easy it is to create a fake boarding pass, walk right around things like no-fly lists, with prohibited items in your pockets, consider this: I used to share your opinion.

I once considered it morally and ethically reprehensible that someone would publish ways of circumventing the things that keep us safer. A number of things changed my mind. One, of course, was Mr. Schneier. Another was the book Little Brother by BoingBoing contributer Cory Doctorow. They caused me to see the instructions on how to defeat most padlocks with a soda can in a new light.

You buy locks to keep your things yours. You now know that a great many people know how to walk right through that lock like it's not there. After you get over the initial fear that nothing is safe anymore, you go out and buy a new, functional lock. And that makes you safer.

My mother lives in a "gated" community. I say that in quotes because the "gate" is operated by people who are not working for the TSA, for what ever reason, and can be walked right around - and frequently is. When you pull up and say, "hi, I'm here to see my mom," they ask, "do you have the number?" being too lazy to look it up. (I'm only assuming laziness - there could be other reasons they might not be willing or able to discern the numbers and their order in a book.)

"Sure," I say, "it's [my wife's cell phone number]." My wife, sitting next to me, answers the ringing phone in her hand when the "guard" calls and says, "OK, let them in."

Did I harm anyone (besides the gate operator's feelings)? Did I point out a flaw in the system? If you live there, do you feel safer knowing this? Do you really think no one of criminal intent has already found - and possibly already exploited - this flaw? Should you chastise me for pointing it out to everyone (put the keyboard down, mom) or should you find a way to fix it?

Not only are the TSA's rules seemingly arbitrary, they're capriciously enforced. (big "DUH!" if you've flown recently.)

My wife and I are waiting on the security line to board a plane. I take from her hand, by mistake (because I would never purposefully try to create a stir that could get me arrested), her ticket and passport. Handing them to the agent who took enough time from talking his buddy to hold out his hands, he looks them up and down, determines they're valid, and hands them back to me all without looking at my face. Many men have feminine-sounding first names, and it's possible dye one's hair from blond (in the photo) to brown (mine) or vice-versa, but the scruffy, unshaven man holding the boarding pass is decidedly not female.

I'm flying out of Newark, not long after one guy tries (and fails) to light the shoelace fuse on his shoe bombs. Everyone now has to take of their shoes. On the return trip from a, shall we say, less urban airport, I ask, "do I have to take my [boots that lace all the way up past my ankles] off?" "Nah, g'head." So, is rural America safe from us big city folk, but not the other way around? Wait...

Coming back again from said not-so-urban-but-then-I'm-an-east-coast-elitist airport, Sheriff J.W. Pepper pulls my bag aside. "Is this your bag, sir?" I'm expecting a world of crap for the rat's nest of cables and wires for all of the electronics I'm carrying. Pulling items from my bag, he takes the time to remind me that all liquids must be carried in a sealable, zippered, clear plastic bag. He then proceeds to take my toiletries from the zippered, clear plastic bag that came with my luggage, and so doesn't say "Ziploc" on it.
     When I foolishly attempted to argue with the double-digit IQ that was detaining me, saying, "I flew out of New York with everything like that," he says, "New York is a very busy area; they don't take security as seriously as we do here." Truth be told, no one's crashed a plane into anything near there recently. (And then there's those knitting needles...)
     After my dangerous toothpaste was secured in a provided baggie, we all became safer and could fly again. I proceeded down the end of the corridor to put my shoes back on, and my deodorant et al. back into my toiletry bag, in full view of TSA personel. (because real terrorists are not able to get into plastic bags, once they're sealed.)
     In case you were wondering, the only thing this policy keeps safe is your shirt, when the change in cabin pressure makes things like shampoo bottles pop open and drip down out of the overhead. But then perhaps you should be threatened with arrest for being inconsiderate and careless.

As Schneier points out in the Atlantic Monthly article, even when it works, it only keeps you safe from the stupid terrorists.

On another trip, I headed to the automated check in kiosk, instead of the attended but otherwise vacant ticket counter. Attempting to get my boarding pass, I was asked for the credit card on which it was purchased - a corporate card, which I don't have. Next choice was scanning my passport, which I didn't bring for a domestic flight, then my driver's license, which didn't cooperate. Typing in the confirmation number manually produced no results, so it was off to the ticket counter. They were very friendly (really) helping check in the man with only basic ID, without the card under which the ticket was purchased, who attempted to get a boarding pass with no human interaction and failed. It was when I was going through the security check that I noticed the "OOO" on my boarding pass (when the person checking my ID highlighted it).
Singled out for "additional screening," I waited for someone to go through my bag and wipe my laptop with one of those papers that turns blue or something when you're pregnant or there's explosives inside. Unfortunately it was lunch time, so no one was available, except the supervisor (I think) who x-rayed my bag. He said, since he's the one who x-rayed it, he's not supposed to be the one to check manually. This makes perfect sense. He was very apologetic, admitting how silly it was that he had to be the one to look through everything, since he just looked through it on a screen.

The bomb only needs to get through once. If anyone really meant us harm, how many times would they attempt to get truly hazardous things like beer past security, when the worst that happens is they get turned away? 100? 1000? At how many different airports? No amount of Dramamine® can help the sick feeling in your stomach that should cause.

Full of wit: if you can't think straight, then the terrorists have won

2008-10-24T13:01:00.001-04:00

Richard Pryor said:
"Snakes make you run into trees. White people see a snake and go, 'snake!' (turns) POW! (face into outstretched hand)"

Please try to remember this when (that's right when) Bin Laden tries to get you to vote for McCain.

via BoingBoing

clipped from miscellanea.wellingtongrey.net

With Barack Obama so far ahead in the polls some people are getting worried that this election cycle’s October surprise will be a terrorist attack.

keep your brain running at all times. When you switch it off bad things happen.

Air Fair: Adventures in air travel, cont.

2008-10-20T19:16:00.000-04:00

Ah, yes, another blog post griping about air travel. It's a lot like the weather, in that everyone complains about it, but most of us feel powerless to do anything other than check the internet frequently for updates to its status.

Where to begin? The beginning, of course, and that would be the Booking phase.

So I'm going through my company's corporate travel site, as I'm required to, to make my near monthly, last-minute flight reservation to Wisconsin (or as I like to call it, Chez Cheese). As is my custom, I skip right past the Deltas and the AirTrans (are they still in business?) and head straight for the Continentals. I like Continental - never had a problem, and check-in is a breeze as I can do it from my cell phone the day before, with my boarding pass sent straight to the phone.

$1300+change. Ouch. But, it's last-minute, right?

Our corporate travel policy makes the system spit back some alternate flights with lower fares. Fair enough, let's save money if we can. One flight on Northwest, leaving at the same time, is $400+change. Like the Continental, there's a layover in Detroit for an hour and a half, at the same time, landing in Milwaukee at the same time. That's when I notice the "operated by Northwest" on the Continental flight. Yes, they are one and the same plane - at three times the price. They're both Coach, the only difference is the Class code (more on that later).

Now, I'm all for saving the company money, and I don't need someone in the travel office asking me why I paid three times as much for the same plane, but dammit, Continental is where all my frequent flier miles are.

This is where I start to do the math. It's the same flight out, but different flights back. If I use the NWA return on the Cont. (say that out loud) departure, the price goes up, because technically it's mixed carriers, even though it's the same goddamned plane. So I try different options to attempt to figure out the NWA price for the same seat Cont. is charging me. I come to the conclusion that it's capricious and arbitrary.

So I call, and ask the Cont. Customer Service rep if they can do better on the price, seeing as it's the same plane and all. No. You see, even though it's the same coach seats on the same plane, same flight attendants, same room for baggage, there's those different classes - those determine the fare. With everything else being equal, what's the difference? The Elite Status frequent flier miles granted. (turns out NWA is a Cont. partner, and they share miles.)

Turns out the Cont. airfare is three times more because it comes with an extra 50% of frequent flier miles towards achieving Elite Status. (remember that "Status" thing for later.) For the algebraically-challenged, that's $400 for 500 miles or $1300 for 750 - one and a half times the miles, 3 times the price. As I type this, it occurs to me that I could have booked two flights on NWA (still less) and gotten two times the miles (more) - plus a lot more leg room. This is something I'll be sure to bring up to a booking agent.

Not seeing a way to make more miles for me sound like a bargain for the company, I go back and book a flight on NWA, 6 AM to Milwaukee, stopping in Detroit, which is now, the next day, curiously only $260.

Shortly, my wife calls. "Did you mean to fly out of LaGuardia?" Shit. Back to the site, cancel the flight, start the whole thing over again. Only now when I select the Cont. flight (now $1600, thank you), it says, "OK, paid, thanks." So much for that list of cheaper alternates I was expecting (I swear).

Remember all those reasons I said I liked Cont.? Gone. Not only can't I pick my seat, I can't check in for the "partner" flight online. So why exactly am I booking the flight through you, Cont.? The privilege of paying more money per mile?

So it looks like I'm a NWA flier now. I singed up for their program when I went to their site to get my boarding pass.

Remember all those "extra" Elite Status miles I'm getting for the Cont. price? Miles that, eventually, when you accumulate enough, you can redeem for things like First Class upgrades? NWA offers to upgrade me to First for $115. Yeah - one hundred fifteen dollars. In the end, instead of paying $500 for a First Class $400 flight, I pay $1600 for a $400 coach flight with an extra 250 miles that, someday, maybe, with a whole lot more miles, I may try to use to get an upgrade.

Epilogue: while I'm waiting in line to board the plane - general boarding, all rows, all seats - some guy comes up and says he has a First Class ticket and, because he missed the earlier announcement, he should get in front of me. I'd like to think that, had I not been up since 4 AM, I would have thought of something clever to say. I stepped past him.

DRM you, DRM you to hell

2008-10-20T15:37:00.000-04:00

An open letter to NBC.
(you're free to copy/paste this letter, or a version of it, and send it to NBC Direct, their online video distribution channel, at nbcdirect@nbcuni.com.)

I would love to watch high-definition archives of Heroes online, as I can't always get in front of a TV at the scheduled time. I went to your site to watch them, and I am now very offended.

First, I'm offended that you would choose to purposefully exclude me as a patron, or extort additional money from me. You pay a lot of money to get people interested in your shows, then more money to draw them to your website, only to then limit who gets to view the content.

I use a Macintosh, at home, at work and on the road. You have chosen to use a system that is not open to everyone, but is instead limited to a subset of people who patronize Microsoft as your "free" distribution channel. So unless I pay Apple $3 per episode to download them from the iTunes store, I have to pay Microsoft for their operating system.

I am also offended that you choose to treat me like a criminal, for no other reason than I want to enjoy your product. You won't let me view your content because you're worried I might give it to someone - someone who could also get it from your site.

I chose to visit your site to view your content. The first choice is always the easiest and most accessible. I expected that the only encumberment to doing so would be viewing advertising, which I accept. The irony is that, out of concern that people might find an illegitimate distribution channel which would not generate advertising revenue for you, you limit who can access your product legitimately, which reduces your potential ad revenue.

After all the money you spend on advertising and marketing just to get people to watch any particular program, you say, "here, but don't show anyone else." Why, because they might become fans, too, and more people would come to your site to get more content? You want as many paying customers to see the show as possible (even if we are "paying" by viewing ads), then you limit who can come in, just to make sure everyone who's in has paid.

Perhaps the ultimate irony is the people who can do the most damage, the bootleggers and pirates who would appropriate your content and redistribute it for their gain, are already doing so. They don't get the content through legitimate means (hello? VCR?), so they aren't encumbered by the DRM embedded into legitimately obtained content. The only people inconvenienced are the ones trying to do things the right way.

So until you come up with an open DRM system that's accessible to everyone, regardless of which software they use, one that doesn't consider every patron a potential thief (that is, none), I'm going to steal it. I still plan on viewing your content. I'll look at products other people want to sell me as the price of admission. But I don't appreciate being told I can't see something because I might steal it. That means I'm going to patronize the very people you're trying to stop (when instead you're stopping me). They actually want to make the content accessible.

Silly sod - growing roots temporarily

2008-10-15T21:44:00.000-04:00

If you've ever watched Project Runway, you've no doubt heard of Bryant Park. It's normally a quiet little refuge from the push and shove that is New York City, directly behind the Public Library (yes, the one with the lions), about a block from Times Square. In addition to a carousel, a fountain, and dozens of people playing chess, it has a large, wide open lawn. It's a wonderful place to get away from the office and eat lunch. It's also, apparently, a nice place to host fancy, posh events like Fashion Week.

They don't hold it on grass, of course. It is in a tent, but heavens forbid some fashionista got her Manolos muddy, so they set up platforms to put the tent on, covering the entire lawn. This, naturally, kills the lawn.

Witness the devastation wrought by hordes of teenage girls (and their moms) in the aftermath of a free, Good Morning America, Jonas Brothers concert. What you're seeing is mounds of paper cups, soda cans, croissan'wich wrappers and other detritus that was carried in, but, though relieved of their contents, somehow became too heavy to carry out, being raked into piles for collection. Though perhaps it's not their fault - all those lovelorn teens had discarded their hand-lettered cardboard "we love you [Jonas Brothers band member's name]!!!" signs, having failed to attract any of their attentions, and had filled all the garbage cans - both of them.

It's also an ideal spot for a skating rink. Citi, who apparently has enough money left over from buying my account from Wachovia, sponsors the construction of "The Pond." As most of us understand "pond" to be a body of water with, typically, more than 4 inches of water in it, and since there are no permanent structures, man-made or otherwise, for containing water in Bryant Park (besides the fountain), they build a hockey rink on top of the lawn and have the hubris to call it a "pond." This, and all of the support platforms around it, also do not do nice things to the lawn.

Still, it's nice to have a little, virtual winter wonderland, with all the little push cart shops that get set up lining every square foot of the mall. They make it look very pretty for the Christmas season - which, we all know, starts during Fashion Week.

Well, not concurrently, of course. After all the Ugly Betties in their LBD's (that's little black dress, if you're a guy) and the pencil thin queens who think merely being gay conveys an innate fashion sense (I've lived with gay men - it doesn't) have packed up their swag bags and gone home, they take down the [climate controlled] tent, dismantle the platforms, then restore the park to its former [non-barricaded, non-power-cable-entwined] glory.

For about a month.

And we come to the purpose of this post (you knew there had to be one): Between Fashion Week, which runs until Sept. 12, and the opening of the "Pond" on Oct. 24, they take a few days to get a whole team of landscapers out and re-sod the entire freakin' lawn, almost a city block in size - before tearing it all up again. Oh, they even post little signs around the [now roped-off] perimeter that say, "please keep off the grass while the lawn establishes a new root system" ...for at least two weeks, after which we're destroying it for a skating rink and café.

It's a public park, but it's privately managed by a company that's privately funded, so I can't really complain whole-heartedly about the wastefulness. Still, I think there's better things that can be done with that kind of money.

Read the label: It's the cheesiest

2008-10-14T20:22:00.001-04:00

There's nothing like the taste of cheese. And this, I assure you, is nothing like the taste of cheese.

I'm not sure what makes me more ill, that there's a half-dozen or more products, all representing the various states of matter, all named "fat free topping," or that one of those states could be less than 100% grated.

I mean, just what is this product, exactly? It's next to the grated "cheese," and it's similarly packaged, so you're left to infer it's of similar purpose. But, as you can see, the only claims it makes are that it's "fat free" and it's "grated," one hundred percent. (sorry, we've been reading more Horton.)

Oh, and it's a "topping." Not to be confused with fat free whipped topping, however (or the non-dairy whipped topping, or the fat free non-dairy whipped topping - though it should make you wonder what "non-dairy" item(s) laden with fat could be whipped into a topping, what fat free versions of them there are, why they still sell both and why you would choose to top anything you ate with them). They're fat free, so they must be good for you.

Really, how much of this synthetic oil emulsion dandruff do you expect to shower over your Caesar salad (or gooey eggplant parmigiana) that you have to worry about it being fat free? And for the whipped cream pretenders, just what are we supposed to put it on that being fat free would make any difference?

Do you know what Cool Whip® is? Lard. That's right, processed animal fat, like they use to make soap - with sugar in it. Did you know they made a "light" Cool Whip? How, exactly, do you make a low-fat fat? (how much fat in a low-fat fat, if a pole cat spat that fat?) Think about that the next time you're watching some housefrau scoop it up with baby carrots.

And I can hear all the milk-challenged people now, crying about how glandular discharge from a cow's teat could kill them. Shouldn't you people get over your cheese envy already? If you really have problems that Gas-X® won't help, you're probably not prone to eating Caesar salad, you're not going near a parmigiana, and you sure as shit aren't eating ice cream.

Then there's the vegans. Most of the self-compelled herbivores I know eat very healthily - most would not put crap like this into their bodies (well, they wouldn't eat it). But there's the other ones - lifetime PETA members with "meat is murder" bumper stickers (funny how you don't see that the other way around; if A=B, B=A, right?) who would like to believe they don't have canine teeth for a reason. Load your plate with veggies if you will, but don't (like your mom told you) imagine it's something else. If your idea of "sausage" is extruded soy gelatin, if your "burgers" are made of bean paste, then think about poor Wilbur all you want, but you're going to start drooling when you get a whiff of some frying bacon.

I once knew a woman who didn't eat meat. No, she wasn't the anemic bag of antlers who tried to tell me humans can't digest animal proteins (yeah, that happened), she just didn't like the taste (which I can respect). Her family, wanting to include her in the family cookout, would buy tofu "sausage" and veggie "burgers," and felt, "it's OK, they taste just like meat" was a selling point. Don't want it? Don't eat it. If Pavlov could get to you with the scent of barbecue sauce, then eat the freakin' thing already - stop pretending you're somehow "above" that. (don't let the pictures fool you, nothing died to make the food in that link; at least, nothing that wasn't a migrant day-laborer who didn't have it coming.)

[Full disclosure: I've had vegetarian BBQ shredded "pork" and found it better than OK (I'd eat it again), but the tofu "sausage" I tried once (because "it's got the same spices so it tastes exactly the same...") made me want to lick the bottom of my shoe to get the taste out of my mouth.]

But back to the pencil eraser debris in a can - they don't even try to stick the word "cheese" on it, the way my son's macaroni and hydrologized cottonseed and/or palm kernel oil with natural and artificial flavorings does. It's not even a "cheese food product." (and just what is cheese if not food?) No one can convince me there's a justifiable reason to manufacture, let alone give shelf space to such non-comestibles. They continue to sell this crap because people continue to buy it. It just proves that marketing aphorism, it doesn't matter what's in the can as long as the pictures on the outside are pretty.

Unsubstantiated rumor as fact.

2008-10-14T18:47:00.000-04:00

Shot at the newsstand outside my office. Another reason why you should believe absolutely everything you read about celebrities.

(the Us Weekly cover espouses "her European Diet Secrets" right under "No Workouts." It seems the Star is less kind.)

Horton Hears Who's Voting

2008-10-08T22:29:00.000-04:00

My son has a new favorite book: Horton Hears a Who. He wants to read from it every night before bed. It has supplanted previous bedtime staples such as Goodnight Moon, The Going to Bed Book, and I Love You Stinky Face.

He's just 2, and while he listens to the story, I wish I could fully explain to him what the story means: Get out and vote.

Among other things.

At its core, the story is about speaking up for yourself and making yourself heard, "no matter how small."

(It does not have anything to do with people who presume to call themselves "pro life." Anti-abortionists co-opted the "no matter how small" stanza, and only after Theodore "Dr. Seuss" Geisel threatened to sue, did they take it off their stationary - though they still chant it, in movie theaters, in between screaming anti-abortion slogans at children.)

For those of you who don't have toddlers, Horton is an elephant whose really big ears allow him to hear the plight of tiny, near microscopic people called Whos. As others react with depraved indifference, almost destroying their little village, Horton, who is the only one who can hear them, decides to become their protector.

Several antagonists feel it is not enough to ridicule Horton for talking to people they don't think exist, they put him in a cage and try to destroy the Whos (to prove they don't exist, apparently).

Does any of this sound familiar?

John McCain was once asked what he considered "rich." He said "How about $5 million?" He said he was joking, but does he really not consider $1 million wealthy? Are you merely average at $500K?

Here's my question: in McCain's world, is anyone earning under $180K/yr (over 95% of Americans) worth paying attention to? Does he hear you? Do you even exist (to him) if he doesn't?

What economic crisis? Guess what, John McCain is still rich. How about you? Have all your assets been "boiled in Beezle-nut oil?" I guess that proves you don't exist, either.

What difference would one vote make?

In the story, all the Whos are making as much noise as they can, to prove to a sour kangaroo that they're real - all except one. Only with that one extra, "YOPP!" does the kangaroo and the Wickersham monkey clan hear them, and agree to protect them as well.

There was a recent bill in the Senate (# S.3335) to extend tax breaks for alternative energy sources (the kind of tax breaks we currently give oil companies to go find more oil, because, you know, they need an incentive). That bill was defeated by one vote - just one more "yes" and it would've extended tax credits for wind, solar, geothermal, etc. Curiously, Senator John McCain was absent that day. What would his vote have been?

Most registered voters don't even show up to vote. It's extremely easy to get disenchanted. I've been there, myself. I didn't register to vote until my 20's, and it was years after that I cared enough about goings-on to cast another ballot.

I used to say, "what difference would one vote make?" My wife used to say that, too. And her sister, and the bulk of their family, and many people I know who are/were similarly minded. Mine is "just one vote," and together we are dozens of "just one votes." The hundreds and thousands of people in your district who're going to sit at home and have their favorite shows interrupted by election results on Nov. 4 are hundreds and thousands of "just one votes." The last two presidential elections were decided by a few hundred thousand people.

George Carlin had a great argument for not participating. He said that by voting you were buying into the illusion that you actually had a choice in what happens.

I still say that democracy is being allowed to vote on getting a sharp stick in the eye, but when you show up at the poll, the choices are Right or Left.

I still have issues with people who want to be in a position of power over me. There are very few politicians I'd choose to vote for. So, yes, showing up to vote is like asking for a less painful sharp stick in the eye.

I just can't stand idly by and watch people actively try to destroy the little dust speck I live on. I have to make sure the people in Who-ville are heard.

It is pitch black. You are likely to be eaten by a grue.

2008-10-07T13:34:00.000-04:00

moar funny pictures

So, here I am finally getting around to joining the 21st Century. This is my official obligatory, "woo hoo! Lookit me! I are blogging!" post. I hate to make such ado about something most 13-yr-olds manage to do on an almost hourly basis - from their cell phones.

But then I don't know many people my age who blog. A year or two younger than me and a blog is almost as ubiquitous as a cell phone. But not so much for anyone who started high school before Regan was president. (and if you just said, "who?" you likely just wrote "lol" after it on the Twitter feed on your Facebook page.) I do have some friends (one in particular) who've been blogging for some time - back before it was called "blogging." Even before it was 'blog (short for "weblog"). Back when HTML was simple enough to write yourself in a word processor.

These folk have always been on the upswing of things technological. They had computers when DOS was new. They had beepers when the only people who carried such things were drug dealers. (and I include doctors in that category) I, myself, can lay claim to programming on punch cards and attaching my first computer to the TV, but I'm just not a bleeding edge kind of guy.

I've been a bit of a hold-out on just about everything. I was the last of most of the people I know to get a mobile phone. Even the most Luddite of persons will ask, "what's your cell number?" because it's a given that you have one. My father doesn't have Call-Waiting (doesn't believe in it) and even he broke down and got a mobile phone. (and as soon as he figures how he's going to text message those damned kids to get off his lawn.)

Ironically, as much as I like to pontificate, as much as I enjoy re-reading my own e-mails to people (my, that was certainly well-written), I've been humble enough to not assume that there's anyone out there that would care to hear my opinion on anything. More to the point, though I really do think you should listen to my opinion, with 60-someodd%* of people on the internet clamoring for your attention (* a statistic pulled from my rectum), who's to say that claim is any more valid than droves of sophomores with new iPhones?

So, to everyone who's said to me, "here, put this on your blog," or, "you have a blog, right?" or, "which RSS reader do you use to manage all the blogs you read?" - here, I have a blog now. Join me as I stumble about in the dark, trying (perhaps in vain) to become a writer of some merit.

More likely I'll be eaten by a grue.

Dibs

2008-10-06T14:51:00.000-04:00

"It's a hard world to get a break in
All the good things have been taken
But girl there are ways
To make certain things pay
Though I'm dressed in these rags
I'll wear sable some day"
-The Animals, I'm Crying

Like every other great idea I've ever had, I've waited long enough that someone beat me to it. Here I am thinking that I've got a nifty idea for a blog name, and someone's already registered it.

Not entirely true, in this case, as I came upon my idea recently and whoever started theirs did so back in 2001, before we lived in a world of Global Terror (tm). If I'm ever able to figure out who started, then abandoned that site, I might be able to convince them to hand it over to me (and if you know who did, please e-mail me), but until that happens, this URL will have to do.